IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that newly built houses should follow the style of old houses in local areas. Others think that people should have freedom to build houses of their own style. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Opinions are divided on whether newly built
houses
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 should be designed the same as the old
houses
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 in local
areas
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 or whether
people
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 are free to
design
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 their own
houses
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.
While
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 I understand the logic behind the former view, I am still in favor of the
later
Correct your spelling
latter
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. Those who believe that building new
houses
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 should follow the same pattern as the old
houses
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 may have several arguments. They may well argue that new
houses
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 should follow the
design
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 of old buildings in local
areas
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. In the same
areas
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, there are some
houses
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 which are built following the
design
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 of old
houses
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 in those
areas
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.
This
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 is one of the important proofs for the safety of the
design
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. Because of that, many
people
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 built their
houses
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 the same as the structure of old
houses
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 to ensure that their construction is solid and has a long lifespan. Another possible argument is that building similar
houses
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 creates an aesthetic for the
area
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. If most of the
houses
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 in that
area
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 are built
similarly
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 to the old house, these
houses
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 will be the same.
This
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 creates a symmetrical
design
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 for the whole
area
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.
As a result
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, that
area
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 becomes stunning when viewed as a whole.
For example
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, many urban
areas
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 have built rows of similar
houses
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 to increase the aesthetics of that
area
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.
Nevertheless
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, I still believe that
people
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 must build their
houses
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 in their own style for some reasons. Chief among these is that
people
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 have the freedom to modify the
design
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, making the owner comfortable. If they use the old
design
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,
this
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 will have some structure being redundant.
For instance
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, the old often build their
houses
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 with a large garden.
However
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,
this
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design
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 is not a good choice for the young who are enthused about technological
houses
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. The second reason is that the creativity of the house can improve the beauty of the whole
area
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.
In other words
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, when
people
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 have
freedom
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the freedom
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 to build their
houses
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, the local
areas
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 do not have repeating structures. Unique designs make the
area
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 stunning. In conclusion, it is understandable why some may argue that
people
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 have to build in the same style.
However
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, I would take the view that the owner should be free to build their
houses
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.

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language
Try to use more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to make your argument more compelling. This will help in expressing ideas more clearly and engagingly.
task achievement
Work on providing more precise and specific examples to support your main points. This can make your arguments more convincing and relatable.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a smooth transition between ideas and paragraphs to maintain the flow of the essay. While it is generally good, it could be better.
structure
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion which helps in understanding your argument.
task achievement
The main points in each paragraph are clear and relevant to the question topic, showing a good understanding of the subject.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced discussion of both views which greatly enhances the task response.
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