IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1

Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from international competitions. To what extent do you agree?

#people #sports #violence #arts #competitions
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 The government is going to raise taxes. Some people think that sports involving violence,
such
 as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from international competitions. To what extent do you agree Some people think that sports involving violence,
such
 as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from international competitions. To what extent do you agree? Some people think that sports involving violence,
such
 as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from international competitions. To what extent do you agree
Submitted by mohammedelhassan811 on

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task achievement
Your essay recognizes the topic, but it lacks a clear position. State your stance clearly in the introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Ensure your essay addresses all parts of the prompt. For this topic, discuss both sides: the benefits and drawbacks of banning violent sports.
task achievement
Strengthen your main points with more relevant and specific examples. Use examples to illustrate your arguments effectively.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your essay logically. Use paragraphs effectively to separate different ideas and points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea. Use topic sentences to introduce each paragraph's main point clearly.
coherence cohesion
Your essay maintains a fair level of coherence and follows a general structure.
coherence cohesion
The essay has an introduction and a conclusion, establishing a basic structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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