IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays animal experiments are widely used to develop new medicines and to test the safety of other products. Some people argue that these experiments should be banned because it is morally wrong to cause animals to suffer, while others are in favour of them because of their benefits to humanity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Opinions are divided on whether a complete ban should be imposed on animal testing on moral grounds or whether it should be maintained
due to
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 its roles in the development of new therapeutic agents or testing potentially dangerous products.
This
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 essay will examine the logic behind the former view, but I still firmly agree with the latter. Those who argue that
experiments
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 on
animals
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 should be prohibited may have several arguments. They believe that
animals
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 are
also
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 living creatures with their feelings and emotions like
people
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.
Consequently
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, when a testing rabbit is shocked with electronics in drug-researching
experiments
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, it will experience extreme pain, which is an
unaccepted
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unacceptable
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 thing to apply the same action to humans.
People
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 should not treat
animals
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 with physical punishments even when they can withstand regardless these
experiments
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 served
for
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apply
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useful purposes.
Nevertheless
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, I believe that these kinds of studies are of great importance and should not be banned.
Firstly
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,
people
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 are currently not able to simulate the activity of the brain and many other parts needed in disease research.
Therefore
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, the use of
animals
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 is still essential.
Secondly
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,
due to
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 the biological similarity between humans and
animals
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, experimenting on
animals
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 will bring more positive results
that
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than
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 other ways of
experiments
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.
Finally
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, many
people
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 believe that the human family can clone many experimental
animals
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 and help them reproduce in large numbers, for long-term research.
Therefore
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, there will be no situation where the number of
animals
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 is reduced or even extinct. In conclusion, it is undeniable that animal testing may have certain limitations.
However
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, I think that
this
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 practice is still necessary and
thus
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 should be allowed for the time being.

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grammatical
Consider breaking up your sentences if they become too lengthy to avoid potential confusion. For example, instead of saying 'This essay will examine the logic behind the former view, but I still firmly agree with the latter.', you might consider rephrasing it for clarity.
support examples
Provide more detailed examples to support your points. For instance, when discussing the biological similarity between humans and animals, you can reference specific studies or examples that highlight this similarity.
coherence
Your essay demonstrates a well-structured approach with a clear introduction and a strong conclusion, which is crucial for coherence and cohesion.
task completion
You have addressed both sides of the argument, and your position is clearly stated and supported.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Ethics
  • Morality
  • Vivisection
  • In vivo testing
  • Cruelty-free
  • Animal welfare
  • Biomedical research
  • Toxicology
  • Sentience
  • Compassionate
  • Humane
  • Speciesism
  • In vitro
  • Alternative methods
  • Pharmacology
  • Clinical trials
  • Bioethics
  • Animal rights
  • Pain threshold
  • Efficacy
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