In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of aging populations.

#world #life #expectancy #individuals #society #measures #impact #populations

Individuals

' average

life

expectancies are enhanced

due to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

world development nowadays. It imposes some negative impacts on citizens and society, but there are several ways to handle

theses

Correct your spelling

these

show examples

problems. There could be a variety of problems caused by the longer

life

expectancy of

individuals

for both

people

and society.

Firstly

, it

aggravate

Correct subject-verb agreement

aggravates

show examples

the burden on hospital

systems

, rendering

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

governments have to spend more money on it,

thus

making

Verb problem

creating

show examples

shortage

Correct article usage

a shortage

show examples

of funds in other industries . To be specific, if

people

have longer

life

expenctancy

Correct your spelling

expectancy

, the portion of old

individuals

will increase.

Due to

the fact that elder

people

are more likely to be infected by disease,

signifying

Verb problem

apply

show examples

the number of patients in

hosipital

Correct your spelling

hospital

hospitals

rising

Add a missing verb

is rising

show examples

Consequently

hosipital

Correct your spelling

hospital

hospitals

should be extended to

fuifil

Correct your spelling

fulfil

patients' demands,

while

that huge fund

Change preposition

for

show examples

construction is paid

Change preposition

for by

show examples

governments.

Therefore

, by supporting hospital

systems

more, there will be less financial

aids

Fix the agreement mistake

aid

show examples

for other aspects.

Additionally

, longer

expecatncy

Correct your spelling

expectancy

also

may increase the population of

city

Add an article

the city

show examples

in a short time, which makes the city become more

crowed

Correct your spelling

crowded

show examples

and uncomfortable.

For example

, there are more

individuals

on the road, in

subway

Correct article usage

the subway

show examples

and

bus

Wrong verb form

on buses

show examples

, leading those places filled with many

people

Hence

individuals

are prone to be disturbed by the

people'

Change noun form

people

show examples

Correct word choice

and noisy

show examples

noisy

Replace the word

noise

show examples

arounding

Correct your spelling

around

them, resulting

uncomfortable

Change preposition

in uncomfortable

show examples

experiences.

However

, there are some

mesures

Correct your spelling

measures

to figure out the troubles

made

Verb problem

caused

show examples

longer

Add an article

the longer

show examples

life

expectancy of citizens. First of all, governments are

suppose

Change the form of the verb

supposed

show examples

rise

Correct your spelling

raise

show examples

public'

Change noun form

public

show examples

health awareness, so that the burden of health

systems

can be relieved.

This

is because

that

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

gaing

Correct your spelling

gaining

more knowledge about how to protect themselves from diseases,

individuals

have less possibility

to get

Change preposition

of getting

show examples

infected.

Therefore

, they do not need to visit

hospital

Add an article

the hospital

a hospital

show examples

. Second of all, creating indoor activities for old

people

can tackle

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the higher population of old

individuals

. Specifically, with more indoor activities, the extra old

people

tend to stay at home rather than

hanging

Wrong verb form

hang

show examples

out.

Thus

, the density of

outdoor

Correct article usage

the outdoor

show examples

poplution

Correct your spelling

pollution

population

in cities will be decreased. In conclusion,

individuals

with longer

life

expectancy

results

Verb problem

have

show examples

in higher burden on hospital

systems

and cities

turning

Verb problem

become

show examples

more crowded.

However

, those problems can be tackled by

rising

Correct your spelling

raising

show examples

public's

Correct article usage

the public's

show examples

health

cousciousness

Correct your spelling

consciousness

and producing extra indoor activities.

Submitted by 1356388645 on Sun Jun 23 2024

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task achievement

Try to provide more detailed examples to support your points. Specific examples help illustrate and strengthen your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Work on improving the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs to make your argument more coherent.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your main points effectively.

task achievement

You have addressed the task by mentioning potential problems and suggesting measures to mitigate these issues, showing a good understanding of the topic.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

359 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

average life expectancy
developed world
increase
individuals
society
personal goals
ambitions
quality of life
leisure
recreation
healthcare costs
challenges
healthcare system
ageing population
shortage
available workers
economy
retirement planning
healthy lifestyles
investing
social support systems

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In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of aging populations.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that having a fixed punishment for all crimes is more efficient. What are advantages and disadvantages of having a fixed punishment?

Air travel can only benefit the richest people in the world. Ordinary people have little to gain from the development of air travel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. Discuss both views and give your opinion.