It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvatanges?
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introduction conclusion present
Your essay needs a clearer introduction. Consider starting with a hook or a general statement about the importance of taking risks. Then, state your thesis clearly.
complete response
While you mention both advantages and disadvantages, your essay is still very brief and doesn't fully explore these points. Consider providing more elaboration and specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
logical structure
Make sure to use appropriate linking words and transitions to connect your ideas and paragraphs. This will enhance the coherence and flow of your essay.
logical structure
Your essay currently lacks a clear structure, with an opening statement, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Attempt to organize your thoughts into distinct sections.
introduction conclusion present
End your essay with a strong conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your thesis in light of the arguments you've made.
relevance
The topic you have chosen is very relevant and important in today’s fast-paced world.
supported main points
You rightly emphasize the importance of good planning as an inherent advantage of taking risks.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
Concentrating only on giving positive feedback when admission do good work rather than criticizing their bad work by terminology work force has sparked considerable debate. While I understand the reason behind this suggestion, I still wholeheartedly disagree with it for several reasons.
Elder people usually prefer to transmit what they have learnt from their family and culture while they are raising their children. While some people believe this is a good idea, many others think that these beliefs and traditions may negatively their offspring's lives. I totally agree with that, as trying to implement the previous thoughts in their minds will have many drawbacks for them socially and educationally.
Nowadays many people are not showing interest to buying newspapers and books whereas they can get it from online without paying. however, it will happen in future also. In my view, I will agree with the statement and the reasons are discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.
This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of three different media, namely books, radio and television. I will argue that television is the most powerful of these three media, in terms of its ability to communicate information.