The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The diagram bar illustrates the number of employees sorted by factors
such
Linking Words
as kind of job and gender, in Australia during the
last
Linking Words
year. The quantities are given in percentages.
To begin
Linking Words
with, gender is categorized as male and female, and job types have a variety of seven works from Managers to Labourers. Whilst feminines have the higher quantity in two
fields
Use synonyms
, masculinities have the majority in five
fields
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, women are leading the Professionals and the Clerical job types with values of 700 and almost 1000 respectively.
However
Linking Words
, the lowest values correspond to them too. The worst employment of females is located in the Tradespeople and the Production
fields
Use synonyms
with both values of 100.
Secondly
Linking Words
, males have better numbers in terms of employment in the Tradespeople and Production jobs. The difference indicator fluctuates from 800 to 450 approximately in front of women.
In addition
Linking Words
, masculines are leading in the Manager, Semi-professionals and labourers
fields
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by sebastianher18 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words fields with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Employment figures
  • Sectors
  • Significant disparities
  • Gender balance
  • Skewed
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Dominant
  • Inferred
  • Labor market
  • Year-on-year comparison
  • Insights
  • Implications
What to do next:
Look at other essays: