Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
In the past few decades, brain drain has become a national topic around the world.Mostly, not beneficial for anyone.
this
issue prominent
in Add a missing verb
is prominent
the
developing countries, where experts leave to post-industrial Correct article usage
apply
country
for better opportunities. Fix the agreement mistake
countries
This
essay will argue both statements and offer opposite
view in the following paragraphs.
Correct article usage
the opposite
Firstly
, high-demand jobs are backbone
of the country and significantly contribute to the nation’s GDP. Add an article
the backbone
Therefore
, government
allocates Add an article
the government
big
portion of Add an article
a big
a
taxpayer money for universities and educational institutes, where these subjects are Remove the article
apply
conducting
. Wrong verb form
conducted
As a result
, majority
in the society argue that they must retain and serve their own Add an article
the majority
a majority
people
as a payback to their debts. Meanwhile, other
reject the idea of Fix the agreement mistake
others
keep
these Change the verb form
keeping
people
sake of debt repayment while
admiring the freedom of choice,
and Remove the comma
apply
let
them leave.Wrong verb form
letting
In other words
, there has been noticeable
migration trend of these Correct article usage
a noticeable
people
where primarily driven by the search for better economic opportunities and living standards. For instance
, Sri Lankan
is one of the top countries, Correct your spelling
Lanka
that
highly qualified Correct word choice
where
people
have been moving to western
countries Capitalize word
Western
such
as America,United
Kingdom and Australia with respect to the previous reason.
Correct article usage
the United
However
, subject experts are unable to expand their knowledge, just letting established in the motherland.Because,
some nations are more Remove the comma
apply
specialize
in certain industries or areas which can be fruitful to Wrong verb form
specialised
people
who are in the same segment. For chiefly, back in the time America was the pinnacle on
the semiconductor sector Change preposition
of
which
Taiwan decided to send their experts to get subject expertise and practical know-how. After Correct word choice
and
certain
period of time government Add an article
a certain
call
them back to initiate the chip industries Wrong verb form
called
in
locally and now Taiwan is the major supplier of Change preposition
apply
the
microchips Correct article usage
apply
while
surpassing the
America in a greater step.
All things considered, society fears of migration of knowledgeable Correct article usage
apply
people
, that will disrupt the local population and economy while
some accept their personal choice.But in the long run, two endsAdd a missing verb
are
Therefore
, educated people
must go beyond the horizon to expand and return to serve their country.Submitted by magma8000 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a balanced view of both perspectives on the topic and attempts to include relevant examples. However, to improve, focus on enhancing the precision and clarity of your ideas. This can be done by further developing your arguments and ensuring each point is fully explained before moving on.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contains a single clear idea, and use linking words to create smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs. This will improve the logical flow and coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen your introduction and conclusion by making them clearer and more direct. Your introduction should clearly state both sides of the argument and your own position, and your conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points and restate your opinion or offer a final thought.
task achievement
You have attempted to provide both sides of the argument and included relevant examples to support your points. This shows a good understanding of the task requirements.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates an ability to structure paragraphs effectively, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. This is essential for maintaining coherence and cohesion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?