In many countries, people are now living longer than before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extend do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years, many individuals prefer to live longer. In my mind, all
people
are willing to live a lot.
Moreover
, the number of old
people
is increasing.
However
, the number of young
people
and children is decreasing.
Furthermore
, there are fewer children and teenagers compared to adults.
This
is one example of these issues. On the one hand, there are several benefits of a long life. The first benefit is that older humans are generally more intelligent than young
people
.
For instance
, they can be examples for many individuals.
Additionally
, there are financial benefits. If parents work, adults can take care of the young.
This
is because elderly persons are often wiser than others.
On the other hand
, despite the mentioned positives, many elderly
people
may pose problems for others.
For instance
, they might become ill as they get older.
For
this
reason, some
people
need to take care of them, which can be problematic. One of the major disadvantages is that old
people
can become a burden in my opinion. Another important drawback is that they often want to dictate actions but cannot perform many difficult tasks themselves.
This
is another issue. In conclusion,
while
adults can sometimes become a problem for others, some
people
oppose
this
view.
Although
a long life can offer several positives, there may be some drawbacks too. From my personal point of view, the advantages of living longer outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on

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task achievement
Develop your main points with more specific examples. For instance, when discussing the financial benefits of having elderly folks at home, you can mention specific roles they could play in childcare or household management.
coherence cohesion
Try to consolidate and smoothly transition between ideas to enhance the essay's overall coherence. A more cohesive structure guides the reader from one point to another seamlessly, improving the reading experience.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive statements and redundancies. Instead of reiterating that elderly people might become a burden, elaborate on how societal structures can mitigate such issues or showcase more specific instances.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
The response adequately addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of an ageing population, keeping relevant to the prompt.
coherence cohesion
Good use of transitional phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand,' which helps to contrast different points.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Ageing population
  • Pension systems
  • Healthcare demand
  • Workforce demographics
  • Life expectancy
  • Economic productivity
  • Intergenerational relationships
  • Cultural heritage
  • Social services
  • Government spending
  • Skills gap
  • Public services
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Seniority advantage
  • Elder care
  • Demographic shift
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