Some people believe that there are various reasons that can motivate a person to keep working for the same company whereas others say that money is the main reason which gives motivation. Do you agree or disagree?#

These days, the types of jobs a person can do
varies
Wrong verb form
vary
show examples
and companies are finding creative ways to make use of the
man power
Correct your spelling
manpower
show examples
available to the best case possible to grow their businesses. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
money is important literally in
everyone
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everyone's
show examples
life, there are certain
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
of people who are willing to stay in a
company
for a very long
time
other than financial reasons.
Therefore
, in
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will
further
discuss
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
statement. The reason why an individual would stay for a long period of
time
could be because of their family commitments.
For example
, if a woman is married and
having
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
kids and
also
already bought a house
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
a particular area might prefer to stay in the same
job
as long as possible because she needs a stable
job
to secure her family life. Not only that, for a woman, distance is very important because she might need to attend to her kids as soon
possible
Change preposition
as possible
show examples
any
Change preposition
at any
show examples
time
of the day. The nearer the
company
is to her home,
more
Correct article usage
the more
show examples
likely she will stick to that same working place for a very long
time
.
In addition
,
optimistic
Correct article usage
an optimistic
show examples
working environment will
further
encourage any person to stay long in that
company
.
This
is because
,
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apply
show examples
society
are
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is
show examples
prioritizing mental health
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days and the
job
itself is already stressful because they need to meet the target by
end
Correct article usage
the end
show examples
of the month.
Therefore
, when an individual
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
surrounded by
non toxic
Add a hyphen
non-toxic
show examples
collegues
Correct your spelling
colleagues
and bosses, they can go home and tackle other issues in family and community.
Besides
,
work
Correct article usage
the work
show examples
timing flexibility of the
job
also
makes people willing to settle in that
company
for a very long
time
. In conclusion, it is not wrong to prioritize money to stay in a place but having good mental health and
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
working environment is
also
important.
Submitted by coke_sars on

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introduction conclusion present
While the introduction is clear, ensure that you restate the essay prompt more explicitly to frame the argument better for the reader.
relevant specific examples
Provide a more diverse range of specific examples to strengthen each argument further.
logical structure
Connect the paragraphs more explicitly with linking phrases or words to enhance the flow of ideas.
complete response
The essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the prompt, addressing multiple perspectives.
supported main points
The main points are well-supported with logical reasoning and relevant examples.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the key points and presents a balanced view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • motivation
  • job satisfaction
  • personal fulfillment
  • career development
  • growth opportunities
  • continuous learning
  • training
  • promotions
  • positive work environment
  • supportive management
  • good relationships
  • colleagues
  • benefits
  • perks
  • health insurance
  • retirement plans
  • flexible working hours
  • company culture
  • values
  • recognition
  • rewards
  • job security
  • stability
  • economic uncertainty
  • employee loyalty
What to do next:
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