All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem aﬀects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity, How could it be tackled?

#world #societies #obesity #aﬀects #children #adults #rise

There are reasons you feel so good when you wake up from a long, restful sleep, but for many people getting enough sleep can be difficult. So what is happening when you sleep Why is it important And what can you do to ensure you get enough B There are five stages of sleep: when you fall asleep, you go into

stage

1, which is light sleep and quite easy to be woken up from,

then

you move into

stage

2, 3, and

then

4, with each

stage

getting progressively deeper. After about 1.5 hours you go into another

stage

called REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, which is when most dreaming happens.

This

cycle happens around 5 times per night.

Submitted by ahmedaziz9811 on Wed Jun 26 2024

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task achievement

Ensure your introduction clearly outlines the topic and sets up a roadmap for the essay. A conclusion should summarize the main points discussed.

coherence cohesion

Improve coherence by using linking words and transitions between sentences and paragraphs. This helps in maintaining the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Provide more relevant specific examples or evidence to support your points. For instance, talk about how lifestyle changes or technological advancements contribute to sleep issues.

task achievement

The essay provides a clear explanation of the stages of sleep, effectively demonstrating understanding of the subject matter.

coherence cohesion

The information about the stages of sleep is well-organized which makes it easy to follow.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

120 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem aﬀects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity, How could it be tackled?

Include an introduction and conclusion

You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include : &Where you stayed. & What the problems were. & How they can fix your complaints.

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Unemployment remains the biggest challenge to school leavers in most countries. How far do you agree with this assessment?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?