More and more people relying on private car as their major means of transportation. Describe some of the problem overreliances on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution
A large number of individuals prefer to have their own motor vehicles to get around the city.
However
, it is clear that
it is a big issue such
as carbon dioxide emission into the air . The most viable solution is increasing tax
on cars by the government.
The principal cause is associated with Correct article usage
the tax
gasses
CO2. Automobiles which work with petrol, their electric motor generates CO2. Replace the word
gas
Therefore
, the environment deteriorates , also
humans too
have problems with health like headaches. Rephrase
apply
For example
, scientists
Change noun form
scientists'
scientist's
researches show
that one of the main Correct subject-verb agreement
research shows
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
of
global warming is that Change preposition
for
wheels
quantity Correct your spelling
the
going
up every day and their gasses destroy the Earth which can come to that all people can disappear from our planet.
To tackle Verb problem
of water goes
this
problem the government should raise the taxes for
cars. When a person buys a car , he pays Change preposition
on
tax
for that and a big tax
can decrease the amount of drivers, owing to a budget which they do not have . For instance
, Denmark has the highest taxes for cars, because
of that more humans choose bicycles or public Correct word choice
and because
transports
. In a Fix the agreement mistake
transport
way
it can help people’s health.
To summarize , many people’s interest in having their own motors can cause problems like CO2 emission. For decline, that Add a comma
way,
tax
for automobiles must move upward. I believe that humans will understand consequences
of using automobiles and that their upsurge have huge problems for us, Correct article usage
the consequences
also
for the planet.Correct word choice
and also
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task achievement
Expand on your ideas and provide more relevant examples to fully support your arguments and enhance the essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring that your essay includes a clear and concise thesis statement in the introduction, and revisits this idea in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Focus on linking your ideas more effectively across sentences and paragraphs to improve the flow and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
The essay effectively identifies a key problem related to the overreliance on cars: carbon dioxide emissions, and provides a corresponding solution: increasing taxes on cars.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical and easy to follow: it begins with an introduction, develops the main points in the body paragraphs, and concludes with a summary and personal opinion.
task achievement
The essay makes an effort to support the main points with examples, such as the mention of Denmark’s high taxes on cars.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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