More and more citizens relying on private vehicles as their major means of transportation. Describe some of the problem overreliances on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution.

Gradually more individuals prefer their own cars as their main conveyance. There might
several
Add a missing verb
be several
show examples
issues originated because of
increased
Add an article
the increased
an increased
show examples
number of personal autos,
such
as
air
pollution.
Nevertheless
, scientists from
whole
Change preposition
around whole
show examples
world found
easy
Add an article
an easy
show examples
way to solve
this
problem and
this
is
increase
Fix the infinitive
to increase
show examples
production
Correct article usage
the production
show examples
of electric cars. Growth in the amount of privatised
automobiles
may
origin
Replace the word
originate
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of serious
problems
. One of them is
air
dirtying. Harmful gases produced by car engines
affects
Correct subject-verb agreement
affect
show examples
the atmosphere and contaminate it.
As a result
, there would
problems
Add a missing verb
be problems
show examples
such
as acid
rains
Fix the agreement mistake
rain
show examples
,
greenhouse
Correct article usage
the greenhouse
show examples
effect and global warming.
For example
, Almaty, which is the most populous city in Kazakhstan, has serious challenges with
air
. From the
mountains
Add a comma
mountains,
show examples
anybody can see smog clouds all over the city.
According to
scientists,
this
problems
Fix the agreement mistake
problem
show examples
started in the
last
century, but
situation
Add an article
the situation
show examples
worsened in recent times proportionally to
rise
Correct article usage
the rise
show examples
of wheels. Scientists found
out
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some possible solutions to
this
issue and one of them is to
increase
manufacture
Add an article
the manufacture
show examples
of electric
automobiles
. Battery-driven vehicles do not use fossil fuels
such
as petrol, diesel fuel and natural gasses.
Instead
of fuel combustion,
this
type of
machines
Fix the agreement mistake
machine
show examples
use
Change the verb form
uses
show examples
electric energy.
For instance
, in
Correct your spelling
Norway
Norways
Correct your spelling
Norway
the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of eco-friendly cars increased by 30%, which improved
Correct article usage
the situation
show examples
situation
Correct article usage
the situation
show examples
with
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
and
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
. Researchers discovered that
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
pollution coefficient decreased to 1 category with the growth of electric-powered machines.
To sum up
,
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of private
automobiles
leads to serious
problems
such
as
air
contamination. In order to solve
this
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
show examples
problems
, humanity has to
increase
manufacture
Add an article
the manufacture
show examples
of electric
automobiles
.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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sentence structure
Work on using more complex sentence structures to enhance readability and depth. For instance, combine shorter sentences to create varied and rich sentence patterns.
cohesion
Improve transitional phrases and cohesion by ensuring that each paragraph flows logically from one idea to the next. This can involve using more sophisticated connectors and transitional devices.
task response
The essay systematically addresses the task by explaining the problems and providing a solution. This shows a good understanding of the task requirements.
examples
Specific examples, such as the case of Almaty and Norway, help to illustrate the points effectively.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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