Advertising are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development ?
In the modern era, when the adverts become popular in daily life. It's
the
good evolution Correct article usage
a
at
Change preposition
apply
all
and Correct determiner usage
apply
bring
many benefits Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
for
Change preposition
to
population
Add an article
the population
Firstly
, advertising will update new items for citizens every time its
more convenient for individuals when they want to Replace the word
it's
it is
looking
for any new products or shopping. Change the verb
look
In addition
, commerce help
dwellers to compare with other products to advance the best choice for their demand. Change the verb form
helps
For example
, boards in city
Correct article usage
the city
alway
supply new toys, soaps, foods, drinks, Correct your spelling
always
accessories
for Correct word choice
and accessories
variety
of Add an article
a variety
age
or television and media Fix the agreement mistake
ages
platform
always post about new electric appliances, Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
the
latest household Correct word choice
and the
commodity
, all of Fix the agreement mistake
commodities
that
can help people to choose what is essential for the need at the moment.
Correct pronoun usage
which
Secondly
, commercial
can introduce the latest experience for residents Fix the agreement mistake
commercials
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
mean
people can Correct subject-verb agreement
means
know
about new travel at mystery Verb problem
learn
place
, Fix the agreement mistake
places
try
recently launched services. Correct word choice
and try
Furthermore
, advertising supplys
the price Correct your spelling
supplies
supply
by
Change preposition
in
the
Correct article usage
a
clearly
way, it Change the word
clear
make
citizens Change the verb form
makes
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
the
precise awareness about the level of expensive or cheap that services can be and will Correct article usage
apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
suitable
for Add a missing verb
are suitable
themselves
. Correct pronoun usage
them
For example
, people can try about
new features on Change preposition
apply
iPhone
15 Pro Max, new optimistic game turbo on Red Magic 9 Pro or citizens can consider Correct article usage
the iPhone
to experienced
Change preposition
experiencing
about
hazardous games in Change preposition
apply
new
Add an article
the new
a new
entertaining
park Replace the word
entertainment
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
bring
individuals what they need to do to improve Verb problem
show
the
mental of life and how much they can Change the word
their
paid
for Change the verb form
pay
be paid
experience
.
In conclusion, Add an article
the experience
development
of Correct article usage
the development
advertise
in Change the verb form
advertising
contemporary
era Correct article usage
the contemporary
bring
about Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
positive
impact Correct article usage
a positive
for
Change preposition
on
process
Correct article usage
the process
evolve
of Replace the word
of evolution
human
. Fix the agreement mistake
humans
Nevertheless
, if advertising in certain
level it can make the best profit and the contrastCorrect article usage
a certain
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task response
Try to make your introduction more precise and focused. The sentence 'It's the good evolution at all and bring many benefits for population' can be rephrased for clarity and correctness.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and is logically developed. At times, the essay becomes difficult to follow due to sudden jumps between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Be careful with sentence structures and grammar. Some sentences are difficult to understand due to grammatical errors and awkward phrasing.
task response
Review vocabulary usage. Some word choices are incorrect or awkward (for example, 'dweller' instead of 'consumer' or 'residents').
task response
You provided specific examples for your points, which strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion, giving the essay a complete structure.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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