The differences between countries are becoming less and less evident, as people all over the world wear the same fashions, use the same brands, have similar eating habits and watch the same TV channels. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh its disadvantages?

#differences #countries #people #world #fashions #brands #habits #tv #channels #trend

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These days, technology has been developing more than past;

thereafter

, the most effect

Change preposition

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their global inhabitants" lifestyles; so that, today,

people

who live in various countries have the same customs,

foods

, and TV programs.

While

there are some benefits of similarity evidence, I still believe that these cannot overshadow the drawbacks. On the one hand,

people

who have the same lives have some merits.

Firstly

, if

people

all over the world use the same programs, films, and movies;

therefore

, their behaviours are absolutely the same. In fact, they can connect with each other more easily, especially

people

who emigrate to other countries.

For example

, when you travel to the USA you know their manner

due to

the fact you see American films.

Secondly

, when you eat global meals,

then

if go to other regions you do not worry about the

foods

, for their

foods

are not new for you.

Thirdly

, when you travel Your

clothes

are not amazing for other district citizens and you not only do not wear traditional

clothes

but

also

wear fashion and brand things.

On the other hand

, similarities have some demerits for culture and environment.

Initially

, when

people

wear casual

clothes

routinely;

as a result

, they lose their traditional customs.

In addition

, after many years the new generation will forget their own

clothes

Also

people

who eat regular

foods

might change their flavour;

then

they do not cook their

foods

In addition

, brands and fashion clubs have increased their models. Later

people

who follow these things buy a lot of devices which damage to surroundings.

To conclude

, it appears to me that the drawbacks of the same lifestyles can eclipse the benefits because culture and environment are important factor

Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on Thu Jun 27 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic and provides a clear stance. However, make sure your ideas are fully developed and supported throughout the essay. Consider expanding on the points with more detailed evidence and examples.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea or argument for clarity. This will make it easier for the reader to follow your line of reasoning.

coherence and cohesion

Work on diversifying your sentence structures and using more complex sentences where appropriate. This can help with the flow and cohesiveness of your writing.

introduction and conclusion

Your introduction clearly paves the way for your arguments, and the conclusion effectively summarizes your stance.

relevant specific examples

You provide relevant examples, such as the impact of globalized food habits and fashion, which help to illustrate your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

5.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

5.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

5.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

global community
interconnectedness
cultural exchange
global brands
economic benefits
shared prosperity
cultural identity
cultural diversity
environmental impact
local customs
local businesses
economic difficulties
adaptation
culture shock
dominance

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The differences between countries are becoming less and less evident, as people all over the world wear the same fashions, use the same brands, have similar eating habits and watch the same TV channels. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh its disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Details of politicians private lives should not be published in newspaper. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As the number of cars increases, more money has to be spent on road systems. Some people think the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that drivers should cover the costs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

4.What key criteria does your target company use in their recruitment process?

Some people suggest that setting up more gyms will encourage people to remain active. What problems are associated with this proposal? What solutions can you offer for good health?

It is believed that citizens should pay tax to show their social responsibility. Others believe citizens should take other responsibilities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.