A large number of people are being killed in road accidents every year. Why do so many accidents occur? Make recommendations that would help to reduce the number of road accidents.

#people #road #accidents #year #recommendations

It refers,

there

Change preposition

to there

show examples

are

Verb problem

fact that

show examples

many

road

accidents

are occurring adequately

Wrong verb form

occur

show examples

every year in all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

countries. The main behind these

road

accidents

are damaged roads, poorly maintained vehicles and the driver’s mistakes.

This

essay will discuss about causes and remedies of

road

accidents

Initially

, if the

road

is not maintained well

along with

more ditches and cracks was there,

this

may lead to happen for

road

accidents

Additionally

, during monsoon periods most of the roads will be full of water and slippery, which will cause

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

accidents

In other words

, most vehicles are not maintained properly

Change preposition

show examples

the present situation and heavy vehicles

such

as trucks and buses are not properly inspected by the authorities,

thus

many

accidents

happen in urban areas. To illustrate, in my country, there is a minimum of 40 to 50 citizens

will

Correct pronoun usage

who will

show examples

possible

Change the word

possibly

show examples

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

die daily, because of

this

heavy vehicle collation.

Moreover

, human

error

Fix the agreement mistake

errors

show examples

such

driver’s

Change noun form

driver

show examples

and pedestrian mistakes will

make

Verb problem

cause

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

accidents

Furthermore

, it’s undeniable to eradicate

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

road

accidents

. Simultaneously, authorities and governments can reduce it by implementing stringent traffic rules and vehicle inspections.

In addition

, before issuing driving license,

transport

Correct article usage

the transport

show examples

officer should check the test candidate thoroughly

along with

their background.

Also

road

conditions must be

inspection

Replace the word

inspected

show examples

frequently by the government authorities, if any rupture or ditch

was

Wrong verb form

show examples

there fix it immediately.

Besides

, those who

consumed

Wrong verb form

consume

show examples

alcohol

while

driving must be imprisoned

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because drunk driving will create a fatal accident.

To conclude

, stopping

road

accidents

fully is not possible. Whilst, imposing strong rules and drastic laws can deplete the number of

accidents

in the future.

Submitted by smsundaram57 on Thu Jun 27 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the prompts and discusses both the causes and remedies of road accidents. However, some parts of your essay could be more comprehensive and detailed. Try to expand on your points and provide more specific examples or detailed explanations for a better task response.

coherence cohesion

While your essay is generally well-organized, the logical flow between your ideas needs improvement. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother. Try to use more cohesive devices to link your ideas effectively.

coherence cohesion

There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing present in your essay. Focus on sentence structure and verb tense consistency. Consider revising sentences to be more concise and clear.

coherence cohesion

You have successfully included an introduction and a conclusion, which makes your essay well-rounded.

task achievement

The main points in your essay are relevant and address the prompt directly.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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A large number of people are being killed in road accidents every year. Why do so many accidents occur? Make recommendations that would help to reduce the number of road accidents.

Your opinion

Some people say that the main aim of advertising is to improve the sales of products that people do not really need.

It is observed that communication between family members in today's time is less as compared to the past. However, some people do not think so. Do you agree or disagree?

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.