IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
 graph chart
dispicts
Correct your spelling
depicts
status
Correct article usage
the status
show examples
 of the city population in four Asian countries (Philipines, Malaysia, Thailand, and Indonesia) in
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
 from 1970 to 2040 (with forecast to two decades - 2030 and 2040). At
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
first
sight
Add a comma
sight,
show examples
 it seems that the
quontity
Correct your spelling
quality
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people living in the cities has
rising
Change the verb form
risen
show examples
 in all of the countries. It seems right to me to divide
this
Linking Words
 data into two groups. The first group,
contains
Wrong verb form
containing
show examples
 Malaysia and Indonesia,
demonstraites
Correct your spelling
demonstrates
stable
Correct article usage
a stable
show examples
 rise
due to
Linking Words
 the period of 70 years without changes and picks. In
Malaysia
Add a comma
Malaysia,
show examples
 the city population
grows up
Wrong verb form
is growing
show examples
 gradually from 30% in 1970 to 75% in 2020, with the prediction of
additional
Correct article usage
an additional
show examples
 rise
up
Change preposition
of up
show examples
 to 81% in 2040. In
sum
Add a comma
sum,
show examples
 it reaches the increasing of more than 50%. In
Indonesia
Add a comma
Indonesia,
show examples
 the
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
 is quite the same - like 50%,
started
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
 from 12% in 1970, with the point of modern
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 of 50% in 2020, and prediction of additional growth of 10% ( in total 48%) in the next two decades. The members of the second group are Thailand and
Philipines
Correct article usage
the Philipines
show examples
. In
Correct article usage
the Philipines
show examples
Philipines
Correct your spelling
Philippines
show examples
 we can see the first
pick
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
 in 1990 of
almoust
Correct your spelling
almost
 50% (increased from 32% in 1970), after that percentage of
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
 population decreased to 40% in 2010, and started to rise gradually with the prediction of 50% in 2040. In Thailand
it
Correct pronoun usage
there
show examples
 was
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 stable minimal growth from 18% in 1970 to 28% in 1990, and after that stable
plato
Correct your spelling
period
due to
Linking Words
 the 30 years with 29% in 2020. But they are predicting
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 sharp increase from 29% to 49% in the next 20 years.
Submitted by anastasia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "due to".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: