🔶Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. 🔸Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Once Ludwig Metzel said: "
Advertisement
is the engine of trade". Undoubtedly it is the absolutely right quote.
However
, advertising has become utterly rife
the
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with the
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method of promoting
of
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apply
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many commodities and services nowadays. Some people believe that it is still an effective way,
while
others adhere to the contrary opinion.
This
social phenomenon will be devoted
this
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to this
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essay.
To begin
with the first point of view. First and foremost,
advertisement
is
a
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apply
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vital for small enterprises because nobody will know about them
otherwise
. Qualified
advertisement
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advertisements
show examples
must exert a powerful influence on feels of consumers.
For example
,
due to
celebrity endorsements.
Moreover
, information technologies allow to use
target
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of target
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ads
which
much
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are much
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more effective
thus
smart
algoritms
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algorithms
show more interesting goods for
consumer
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consumers
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.
Additionally
,
advertisement
is a way to insinuate new cultural
standarts
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standards
such
as models of
behavious
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behaviour
behaviours
or
fascion
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fashion
of clothes .
Secondly
, we will consider the next point of view. Proponents of
this
idea allege that
ads
has
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have
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become useless because consumers have started to use
a
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apply
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critical thinking and become more desensitized.
Ads
creates
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create
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an information noize
therefore
people have a fatigue. Consumers choose miscellaneous products
according to
appelaling
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appearance
and quality of products. Inasmuch as most portion of
advertisement
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advertisements
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is
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apply
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a boring nonsense
and
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apply
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people get used to
ignore
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ignoring
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it
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them
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. It is worth noting that famous companies don't need PR. In conclusion, I am
supporter
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a supporter
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of the first opinion. I understand increasingly the level of competition
of
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in
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ads
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the ads
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market but I believe that target
advertisement
and other smart approaches are effective.
Submitted by andreidiakov2100 on

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task response
It's important to ensure that the introduction clearly states the topic and lays a foundation for what will be discussed. Your opening, though interesting, could be more straightforward in laying out the two opposing views.
task response
The essay covers both viewpoints and includes an opinion, which is good. However, your argument would be more compelling if you provided more detailed examples and clearer explanations for each point made.
coherence cohesion
While the essay presents a structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, it could benefit from a more logical progression of ideas. Try to make the transition between points more seamless.
coherence cohesion
There are moments where the flow of the essay is interrupted by minor errors or awkward phrasing. Aim to enhance the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs.
supported main points
The main points are identified, but they need stronger support and elaboration. Provide specific examples or studies to back your claims.
task achievement
You effectively presented both views and included your own opinion, which is a crucial component of the task.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a clear start and end to your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • psychological tactics
  • emotional appeal
  • celebrity endorsements
  • social proof
  • brand awareness
  • brand loyalty
  • desensitized
  • ad fatigue
  • selective attention
  • ubiquity
  • targeted ads
  • personalization
  • consumer behavior
  • consumer awareness
  • advertising claims
  • societal values
  • effectiveness
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