Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negative development?

According to
the advance of
technology
, nowadays
people
have more opportunities
interact
Fix the infinitive
to interact
show examples
with each other.
However
, I think
technology
will bring disadvantages more than advantages to us in the future.
Technology
has several ways to impact the different
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of relationships between
people
.
Firstly
, because of public
transportation
Add a comma
transportation,
show examples
we can easily
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
travel around the world and learn different types of
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
and
ritual
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rituals
show examples
, it
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
our bonding tight with other countries.
Additionally
, the internet
also
plays a crucial role in our
dialy
Correct your spelling
daily
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
, it not only
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
us keep
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online
interact
Replace the word
interacting
show examples
with
friends
and families who live in other countries, but
also
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
a new way to rich our social life.
For instance
, we can make new
friends
online and learn different
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of food and
people
through the internet.
Although
technology
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
several convenient and novel social
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
to us;
however
, there are some drawbacks
development
Change preposition
to development
show examples
. We can easily make
friends
online,
while
there are plenty of scams behind the internet.
For example
, young
people
might
knew
Change the verb form
know
show examples
a girl from
instagram
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Instagram
show examples
but
couldn't
Wrong verb form
can't
show examples
easily
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
distinguish
she
Correct word choice
whether she
show examples
is fake or real, they might spend their money only
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
chat with her.
In addition
,
interact
Wrong verb form
interacting
show examples
with
friends
online is not a great way to keep
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
. When you face them in
real
Add an article
the real
show examples
world, both of you may feel
embarrass
Change the verb form
embarrassed
show examples
and
self-conciouse
Correct your spelling
self-conscious
self-consciously
. In conclusion,
although
the advance of
technology
can bring us
enjoy
Replace the word
enjoyment
show examples
and surprise;
however
, there are lots of traps in social media. You can easily travel
different
Change preposition
to different
show examples
countries because of
Add an article
the advance
show examples
advance
Fix the agreement mistake
advances
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
transportation;
however
,
that is
too costly
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
normal
Add an article
a normal
the normal
show examples
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
.
Submitted by zea14210209 on

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task achievement
The essay addresses the task but the response lacks depth in certain areas. Provide more balanced examples of both positive and negative impacts of technology on relationships.
task achievement
Ideas are partially clear but there are instances of ambiguity. Aim to express ideas more comprehensively and clearly.
task achievement
Some main points are supported with examples, but the examples could be more specific and varied to better illustrate the points.
coherence cohesion
The essay has an introduction and conclusion but the transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt. Work on smoother transitions and logical progression of ideas.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay can be enhanced by having clearer topic sentences and ensuring all parts of the essay flow well together.
coherence cohesion
The main points need more comprehensive support to make the arguments more convincing. Consider expanding on examples and explanations.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which helps frame the discussion.
relevant specific examples
Some relevant examples are provided to illustrate the points made, adding some depth to the discussion.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Interact
  • Social media platforms
  • Networking
  • Instant messaging
  • Face-to-face interaction
  • Misunderstandings
  • Emotional context
  • Superficial connections
  • Deceptive identities
  • Privacy concerns
  • Social skills
  • Video calls
  • Online presence
  • Digital communication
  • Cyber relationships
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