In some places, money earned from tourism has become an important part of the economy. What are the advantages and disadvantages of replying on tourism as a major source of revenue.
Toursmity has become widespread across the globe,
hence
people travel to attractive Linking Words
countries
on vacations and spend a huge amount there. The income of these Use synonyms
countries
depends on Use synonyms
tourism
totally or partially, it could become the initial Use synonyms
source
of these states and have a positive impact on them. Use synonyms
however
, it might cause serious consideration if it is the only Linking Words
source
. Use synonyms
This
essay will display the benefits and drawbacks of Linking Words
this
case substantially.
The Financial Benefits of Linking Words
tourism
are countless and expand in the cities by raising the fundamental developments and the citizens' revenue. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, it creates new jobs that could increase the national economy with great advantages for individuals and governments. Especially for Linking Words
countries
that have no natural resources, Use synonyms
for instance
, the Kingdom of Jordan depends majorly on Linking Words
tourism
which refreshes their economy and the development of their country.
Use synonyms
However
, The drawbacks of depending on Linking Words
tourism
as the major income is risky are that the attractive places could be less important for some visitors or these places could affected negatively Use synonyms
due to
reasons like the Covid-19 crisis. All Linking Words
countries
had a damaged financial impact Use synonyms
therefore
a lot lost their jobs and Linking Words
tourism
stopped which reflected the risk of laying on the avenue of visitors.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, Linking Words
tourism
is a great Use synonyms
source
of income for several Use synonyms
countries
which empowers their economy positively ,leads to the development of many cities, and supports the life of locals. Use synonyms
However
, the risk depends on it as the only Linking Words
source
. the advantages absolutely outweigh the disadvantages.
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task achievement
You have done a good job of addressing the topic and laying out the benefits and drawbacks of relying on tourism as a major source of revenue. However, try to better support your arguments with more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader through your argument. Ensure that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next to improve coherence. Consider using more transitional phrases to enhance the logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences need rephrasing to improve clarity. For instance, "The Financial Benefits of tourism are countless and expand in the cities by raising the fundamental developments and the citizens' revenue" could be clearer if rephrased or broken into smaller sentences.
task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, and your conclusion succinctly summarizes your main points.
coherence cohesion
You address both the advantages and disadvantages of relying on tourism, giving a balanced view of the topic.
task achievement
The essay remains focused on the topic, which is an excellent point.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.