Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In
this
day and age, the Linking Words
lives
of Use synonyms
people
become better and more convenient. Some individuals argue that today, we have a lot of choices. In my point of view, I totally agree with it. The following essay will show my opinion.
Use synonyms
Firstly
, now Linking Words
people
's Use synonyms
lives
are developing very much. So Use synonyms
people
have a lot of choices related to food because there are appearances of many new restaurants or stalls which can serve them at all times. Use synonyms
In addition
, they Linking Words
also
serve a lot of types of dishes so Linking Words
people
not only can enjoy native dishes but Use synonyms
also
other countries's cuisine. Linking Words
Moreover
, individuals can enjoy both there or at home so they are flexible when they are too busy. Linking Words
For example
, in the morning, they can eat bread at home. Linking Words
Then
they are able to eat Korean food or Vietnamese food for lunch or dinner in the restaurants.
Linking Words
Secondly
, nowadays, Linking Words
people
make many decisions about devices which are helpful for their Use synonyms
lives
. Technology is growing very fast and become popular. As citizens can see, a great deal of new devices have been invented Use synonyms
such
as smartphones, TVs, computers, and washing machines. So it helps Linking Words
people
work faster and more efficiently. Use synonyms
In addition
, it Linking Words
also
brings a wonderful time to relax after a stressful day. Linking Words
For instance
, when Linking Words
people
want to entertain themselves, they can watch videos or play games on a smartphone, TV iPad, or computer.
In conclusion, today, individuals can have many choices in their Use synonyms
lives
because the living standards of citizens have improved very much and become better and more convenient. In my opinion, I totally agree with it.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and you have a good layout. However, try to refine your introduction by combining the thesis statement with the introduction instead of separating them completely. This will make your essay more cohesive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure you stick to a single clear argument in each paragraph. Your paragraphs, especially the first one, can be more focused. For instance, in the first paragraph, you talk both about variety in food and options for eating at home – consider focusing on just one aspect to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task prompt well, but there are places where you can offer more detailed justifications. For instance, you mention that technology makes work faster and more efficient – providing specific details or examples can make this argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Improve the use of transitional phrases. Use varied linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and between paragraphs more seamlessly. This will help the reader follow your argument better.
task achievement
You offer a general response to the question and maintain a clear position throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points, reiterating your clear stance on the issue.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure. Each paragraph is dedicated to a main point which supports your overall argument.