We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. What things will they be used in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits?

It is admitted that
computers
play an important role in human daily
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
, which appear in many social aspects. The
advancements
in
computers
increase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human well-being.
Initially
, the significance of
computers
in education is undeniable, which spreads the benefits of online learning. The chief benefit is flexibility, allowing individuals with busy schedules to enhance their skills and knowledge conveniently by participating in
vitural
Correct your spelling
virtual
lessons in
web-based
Add an article
a web-based
show examples
platform. The ability to access lectures and course materials at one's own pace and convenience is a significant advantage.
Besides
, the immediate feedback provided by AI systems helps learners to identify their weaknesses, meantime providing personal modified summaries for each
learners
Change to a singular noun
learner
show examples
.
Additionally
, the
advancements
in
computers
and telecom
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
show examples
assist
to
Change preposition
in to
show examples
utilize
Replace the word
utilisation
show examples
smart
Change preposition
of smart
show examples
devices for public services and daily activities.
In particular
, installing more surveillance cameras leads to enhanced monitoring, which significantly contributes to reducing crime. In public spaces, the widespread use of CCTV and inspection cameras has made it more difficult for criminals to act without being detected.
For example
, the prevalence of CCTV in road networks prevents aggressive driving activities like overloading, racing, speeding and passing red lights. The computer can recognize any driving license plates based on high-quality videos recorded, leading to later punishment tickets transferred to
recklessness
Replace the word
reckless
show examples
drivers.
However
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computer
advancements
also
bring opportunities and challenges for ordinary employees.
Firstly
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
AI achievements allow individuals to automate their routine
tasks
, freeing up human resources for more complex
tasks
. A programmed software works faster and more
accurate
Change the word
accurately
show examples
in data processing despite how many workloads.
Consequently
, automation leads to unemployment in certain sectors, especially in low-skill jobs.
This
,
however
, brings additional benefits for employees who can keep pace with the current fast-paced change by increasing practical experience and upskilling expertise. The proficiency of
such
programmes brings employees some competitive edges in their recruitment processes, providing more favourable career opportunities and working in well-paying
position
Fix the agreement mistake
positions
show examples
.
In contrast
, there are some serious concerns about too
reliance
Correct quantifier usage
much reliance
show examples
on
computers
. Many cybercriminal gangs have exploited security gaps in
softwares
Correct your spelling
software
and operating systems to serve their demands,
such
as blackmailing or stealing valuable information.
To conclude
,
computers
undeniably play a crucial role in various aspects of modern life, including education, public safety, and daily
tasks
. Their
advancements
have significantly improved human well-being by offering flexibility in learning, enhancing crime prevention, and automating routine
tasks
.
However
,
this
increasing dependence on
computers
also
brings challenges,
such
as job displacement and cybersecurity threats.
While
the benefits of computer
advancements
are substantial, it is essential to address the associated risks. Ultimately, the key lies in leveraging technology to enhance human capabilities
while
mitigating its potential drawbacks.
Submitted by lenam2k1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Focus on improving the grammatical accuracy and sentence structure. There are several minor errors and awkward phrases that can interrupt the flow of reading.
vocabulary
Provide more varied vocabulary to avoid repetition and add depth to the essay. Occasionally, words were repeated or used awkwardly.
structure
The essay has a clear and logical structure, with a strong introduction and conclusion.
content
Main points are well-supported with detailed examples and explanations, particularly regarding the role of computers in education and public safety.
task response
The response addresses the task comprehensively and considers multiple perspectives, covering benefits and potential drawbacks of increasing dependence on computers.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Smart traffic management
  • AI (Artificial Intelligence)
  • Machine learning
  • Personalized treatment
  • Virtual classrooms
  • AI tutors
  • Smart homes
  • Energy consumption
  • Grocery shopping automation
  • Data analysis
  • Decision-making assistance
  • Efficiency
  • Mainstream adoption
  • Predictive algorithms
  • Personalization
What to do next:
Look at other essays: