Living in the country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In
this
modern day,in search for better opportunities,it is
main
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the main
a main
show examples
issue for
people
to live in a countries, where you have to learn a various
language
,I totally concur with
this
topic
due to
the fact that, if
people
do not know foreign languages, they will not find a well-behaved job.In that case,I will consider the reasons and open my own views. To start with,difficulties
to build
Change preposition
in building
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your career are closing off for
people
who handle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
foreign
language
.
Language
barrier
Fix the agreement mistake
barriers
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can block progress to develop in
other sphere
Change the wording
another sphere
other spheres
show examples
.
Moreover
,it
make
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makes
show examples
it hard to communicate with other
people
and find
worthy
Correct article usage
a worthy
show examples
environment.
For example
,you have been hired, but you are having misunderstandings with the
people
there, because of the lack of a
language
barrier.It
also
shows
their
Change the word
the
show examples
underemployment of a person.
To conclude
next,
searching for the social factors of local
language
in a foreign country.If you love
journey
Correct article usage
the journey
show examples
,
in
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
there
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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could be hard to make friends.The worst one
when
Add a missing verb
is when
show examples
you need some help you can’t even communicate with them
it all
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, it
also
serious
Add a missing verb
has serious
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repercussions.
This
leads to anxiety and self-doubt, and as well
to
Change preposition
as
show examples
loneliness, it will be difficult for you to find new acquaintances,
because
Correct word choice
and because
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of that you might appear the feel
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
mental health issues with discomfort.
Consequently
,social contact will
beginning of
Wrong verb form
begin
show examples
loosening for a person who does not know the local
language
. In conclusion, knowledge of
language
always be
excellent
Add an article
an excellent
show examples
example for
people
who want to live in the best opportunities.
Furthermore
,
to learn
Change the verb form
learning
show examples
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
will illustrate the material of that country.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay should have a clear structure, including a strong introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion. Consider using topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to signal the main idea.
coherence cohesion
Try to use linking words and cohesive devices more effectively to connect your ideas and make your essay flow more smoothly. Phrases like 'firstly,' 'in addition,' and 'finally' can help guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
While you have addressed the prompt, your essay would benefit from further development of your arguments and more specific examples. Delving deeper into the issues will demonstrate your ability to fully engage with the topic.
task achievement
Your ideas are generally clear, but at times, grammatical errors and awkward phrasing make it difficult to fully understand your points. Review sentence structures and verb forms to enhance clarity.
task achievement
When providing examples, try to make them more specific and relevant to the topic. Specific examples can illustrate your points more effectively and lend more weight to your arguments.
content
You have addressed a relevant topic and attempted to provide a position on it. This shows that you are engaging with the question.
structure
Your essay includes an introduction and conclusion, helping to frame your argument and provide closure.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • linguistic proficiency
  • cross-cultural communication
  • miscommunication
  • social integration
  • linguistic alienation
  • cultural dissonance
  • language acquisition
  • communication breakdown
  • interpreter services
  • language courses
  • bilingualism
  • multilingualism
  • language barrier
  • effective communication
  • cultural assimilation
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