IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The graph below provides information on the number of students from the US, UK and Australia who studied in other countries between 2002 and 2007.

The graph below provides information on the number of students from the US, UK and Australia who studied in other countries between 2002 and 2007.
#information #students #uk #australia #countries
the line graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
number
Add an article
a number
the number
show examples
 of students that study in a country
that is
 not their original homeland between the period 2002 and 2007
Correct your spelling
overall
overral
Correct your spelling
Overall
, the
numbers
 between the three countries differ
while
numbers
 go up in a specific region the
numbers
 go down in the other as shown the
Uk have
Verb problem
UK
show examples
 had a significant
Correct your spelling
decline
dicline
Correct your spelling
difference
 in the amount
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
 people studying abroad in 2003 where
numbers
go
Wrong verb form
went
show examples
 down from 30000 to roughly 21000 by the year 2007 as we can see both
Usa
Correct your spelling
USA
 and Australia had a small fluctuation in the
numbers
,
while
 the
numbers
 in the
Correct your spelling
USA
Usa
Correct your spelling
US
 dropped to about 45000 in 2004
Astralia
Correct your spelling
Australia
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
had a smaller drop
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
numbers
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same year which makes it about 9000
however
, both have seen a rise afterwards where in the
Usa
Correct your spelling
USA
 the
numbers
 go back to 50000
while
 in Australia the
numbers
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 increased to 10000 and went steady afterwards
Submitted by as.reyad on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words numbers with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "go up" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: