Ordinary people try to copy famous personalities by seeing them on TV or reading about them in the newspapers. What is the reason for this? Is it a good idea to copy famous personalities?
Nowadays,
youth
Correct your spelling
young
people
have clear
vision Add an article
a clear
how
they are following popular Change preposition
of how
charchericstics
Correct your spelling
characteristics
whom
attract groups of Correct pronoun usage
that
people
especially teenegers
or Correct your spelling
teenagers
below
18 years old. BecauseCorrect determiner usage
those below
,
the easiest age could be attract are the youngest Remove the comma
apply
people
. Other
reason, still they areCorrect quantifier usage
Another
n't
educated well and difficult for them to recognize either doing Rephrase
stilln't
a
right decision or Correct article usage
the
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
to
Change preposition
apply
that
. Personally, In my Correct pronoun usage
apply
perespective
, ordinary Correct your spelling
perspective
people
must follow educated people
like scientifics
, experts and brainstorming thinkers.
Correct your spelling
scientists
Firstly
, it is very important to follow the individuals which
Correct pronoun usage
who
they
have lots of knowledge and information because it will be more beneficial for their careers and lifestyles. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Secondly
, it is extremely taugh
to develop the countries from all aspects by famous personalities only, Correct your spelling
tough
taught
experts
Change the noun form
expert
people
such
as,
engineers, doctors and Remove the comma
apply
other kind
of workers Change the wording
another kind
other kinds
having
an essential role to Wrong verb form
have
enhence
and build Correct your spelling
enhance
strong
basement to keep the country standing and Correct article usage
a strong
challenging
all Wrong verb form
challenge
difficults
. Correct your spelling
difficulties
difficult
Finally
, wasting the
time seeing Correct article usage
apply
the
some famous Remove the article
apply
people
whom
Correct pronoun usage
who
willing
to earn money against our values and principles.
In conclusion, we must watch famous Add a missing verb
are willing
people
whom
Correct pronoun usage
who
giving
us useful information and share Wrong verb form
give
experience
about events happening in their Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
As well as
, it is Rephrase
Also
Correct article usage
a crusial
crusial
thing that they Correct your spelling
crucial
are respecting
each other without Wrong verb form
respect
interface
the personal information about anybody. They discuss Correct your spelling
interfering
about
critical topics without Remove the preposition
apply
attack
anybody else. Later on, young Wrong verb form
attacking
people
can learn good culture and real ethics.Submitted by king999z on
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task achievement
Make sure to carefully proofread your essay to avoid grammatical errors and improve word choice. This will help in conveying your ideas more clearly.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to strengthen your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and relatable.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and follows naturally from the previous one.
task achievement
Try to expand on each point with deeper explanations and justifications to provide a more thorough analysis.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
The importance of following educated individuals instead of just famous personalities is a valid and well-articulated point.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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