some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree ? Nhi
Not only family
,
Add the word(s)
, but
university
also
is a
extremely important place to form human personality and qualities. In my opinion, I strongly agree that Change the article
an
goverments
should create opportunities Correct your spelling
governments
government
about
tuition for all Change preposition
for
students
to approach higher education without
regardless of their social class.
Change preposition
apply
Firstly
, students
acessing
to Correct your spelling
accessing
university
education have complete knowledge and the ability to find occupation more easily. Therefore
, the propotion
of unemployees Correct your spelling
proportion
Verb problem
has
is decrease
, the country has many talented Change the verb form
is decreased
is decreasing
person
and has a positive view towards diplomatic countries. Change to a plural noun
people
This
leads to economic
Correct article usage
the economic
develoment
of the country. To be specific, there are plenty of universities from powerful countries Correct your spelling
development
such
as :
America , England and Remove the comma
apply
Chiness
that provide a various type Correct your spelling
China
partial
and full scholarships for all Change preposition
of partial
students
who are from developing countries to experience high-class education and extend international relations.
Secondly
, lost
the right to study or Wrong verb form
losing
Correct article usage
an uncomplete
uncomplete
Correct your spelling
incomplete
university
will limit the development of human vision. There is a huge amount people
does not have the ability to access or Change preposition
of people
has
to drop out of Correct subject-verb agreement
have
university
midway just because
their difficult circumstances. Add the preposition
because of
For
this
reason, individuals with less knowlege
will Correct your spelling
knowledge
be lost
Wrong verb form
lose
the
important positions in society. In one aspect of life, people giving up study have to deal with judgment and social class discrimination. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, it is not uncommon for companies to require employees to have a university
qualification and have some considerble
Correct your spelling
considerable
experiences
. Those Fix the agreement mistake
experience
staffs
are not given priority to undertake important jobs, and even lose respect in the working environment.
In conclusion, in my view, each person needs to receive their own equality in social life. To achieve Fix the agreement mistake
staff
this
purpose, goverments
should provide financial support for all Correct your spelling
governments
government
students
to develop the country's economy in particular
and citizens's lives in general.Submitted by midden-02.tore on
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Grammar and Vocabulary
Try to avoid grammatical errors and incorrect word forms, such as 'a extremely' which should be 'an extremely' and 'economic develoment' which should be 'economic development.' These mistakes can affect readability.
Grammar and Vocabulary
Ensure that you use clear and precise language in your explanations. For instance, 'uncomplete university' should be 'not completing university.' Enhancing vocabulary usage would make your essay more compelling.
Task Achievement
In the first body paragraph, provide more specific examples to bolster your argument. Mentioning universities from certain countries without details is less powerful. For instance, you could specify a scholarship program like the 'Chevening Scholarship' from the UK as an example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay could benefit from better transitions between paragraphs. Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas, such as 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' and 'In addition to this.'
Task Achievement
Include more specific facts or anecdotes to support your views. This would enhance the task achievement score. For example, give an instance of a student who benefited from a government scholarship.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This organization is easy to follow and helps in presenting your ideas coherently.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces your position, providing a strong end to the essay.
Task Achievement
You address the task prompt directly and provide a clear and strong opinion, which is a good approach to task achievement.
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