some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree ? Nhi

Not only family
,
Add the word(s)
, but
show examples
university
also
is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
extremely important place to form human personality and qualities. In my opinion, I strongly agree that
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
should create opportunities
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
tuition for all
students
to approach higher education
without
Change preposition
apply
show examples
regardless of their social class. 
Firstly
,
students
acessing
Correct your spelling
accessing
to
university
education have complete knowledge and the ability to find occupation more easily.
Therefore
, the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
of unemployees
Verb problem
has
show examples
is decrease
Change the verb form
is decreased
is decreasing
show examples
, the country has many talented
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
and has a positive view towards diplomatic countries.
This
leads to
economic
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
develoment
Correct your spelling
development
of the country. To be specific, there are plenty of universities from powerful countries
such
as
:
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apply
show examples
America , England and
Chiness
Correct your spelling
China
that provide a various type
partial
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of partial
show examples
and full scholarships for all
students
who are from developing countries to experience high-class education and extend international relations.
Secondly
,
lost
Wrong verb form
losing
show examples
the right to study or
Correct article usage
an uncomplete
show examples
uncomplete
Correct your spelling
incomplete
show examples
university
will limit the development of human vision. There is a huge amount
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
does not have the ability to access or
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
to drop out of
university
midway just
because
Add the preposition
because of
show examples
their difficult circumstances.
For
this
reason, individuals with less
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
will
be lost
Wrong verb form
lose
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
important positions in society. In one aspect of life, people giving up study have to deal with judgment and social class discrimination.
For example
, it is not uncommon for companies to require employees to have a
university
qualification and have some
considerble
Correct your spelling
considerable
experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
show examples
. Those
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
are not given priority to undertake important jobs, and even lose respect in the working environment. In conclusion, in my view, each person needs to receive their own equality in social life. To achieve
this
purpose,
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
should provide financial support for all
students
to develop the country's economy
in particular
and citizens's lives in general.
Submitted by midden-02.tore on

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Grammar and Vocabulary
Try to avoid grammatical errors and incorrect word forms, such as 'a extremely' which should be 'an extremely' and 'economic develoment' which should be 'economic development.' These mistakes can affect readability.
Grammar and Vocabulary
Ensure that you use clear and precise language in your explanations. For instance, 'uncomplete university' should be 'not completing university.' Enhancing vocabulary usage would make your essay more compelling.
Task Achievement
In the first body paragraph, provide more specific examples to bolster your argument. Mentioning universities from certain countries without details is less powerful. For instance, you could specify a scholarship program like the 'Chevening Scholarship' from the UK as an example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay could benefit from better transitions between paragraphs. Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas, such as 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' and 'In addition to this.'
Task Achievement
Include more specific facts or anecdotes to support your views. This would enhance the task achievement score. For example, give an instance of a student who benefited from a government scholarship.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This organization is easy to follow and helps in presenting your ideas coherently.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces your position, providing a strong end to the essay.
Task Achievement
You address the task prompt directly and provide a clear and strong opinion, which is a good approach to task achievement.

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