Some people argue that the government should spend money only on medical care and education but not on theatres or sport stadium.Do you agree or disagree?

There is a debate about whether the government should allocate funds exclusively to medical
care
and
education
, neglecting
theatres
and
sports
stadiums
. I disagree with
this
viewpoint, as investing in cultural and recreational facilities is vital for the holistic well-being of
society
.
Firstly
, it is undeniable that medical
care
and
education
are fundamental pillars of any
society
. Robust healthcare systems ensure that citizens are healthy and productive,
while
quality
education
equips individuals with the knowledge and skills necessary for personal and professional growth. These areas are crucial for the
overall
development and stability of a nation.
However
,
theatres
and
sports
stadiums
play a significant role in enriching the cultural and social fabric of
society
. Cultural institutions like
theatres
promote creativity, critical thinking, and a sense of community. They provide a platform for artistic expression and cultural preservation, which are essential for maintaining a vibrant and diverse
society
.
Similarly
,
sports
stadiums
foster physical health, teamwork, and national pride. They serve as venues for community gatherings and recreational activities, contributing to the
overall
happiness and cohesion of the population.
Furthermore
, a balanced approach to government spending is essential for holistic development.
While
medical
care
and
education
address basic needs, cultural and recreational investments enhance the quality of life. Engaging in cultural and sporting activities improves mental health, reduces stress, and fosters social connections.
For instance
, attending a theatre performance or a
sports
event can provide a much-needed break from daily routines, offering relaxation and enjoyment. In conclusion,
while
medical
care
and
education
are undeniably important, the government should
also
invest in
theatres
and
sports
stadiums
to promote a well-rounded and thriving
society
. A balanced allocation of funds ensures that all aspects of human well-being are addressed, leading to a healthier, happier, and more cohesive community.
Submitted by eparfenenkov on

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task achievement
To further strengthen your task response, incorporate more specific examples and statistics to support your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and grounded.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While your essay is generally cohesive, a few more transitional phrases would enhance the flow.
coherence cohesion
You provided a well-structured response with a clear introduction and conclusion, which greatly aids in understanding your argument.
task achievement
Your writing clearly outlines why both medical care and education, as well as cultural and recreational facilities, are important, providing a balanced perspective on the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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