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Band 7

Some children start school when they are seven years old, while others start at the age of four.what could be the advantages and disadvantages of starting school very early.

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Nowadays, to raise a kid we can face some challenges.
However
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, a diverse range of
parents
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 prefer to make their
children
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 begin school at 7 years old,
while
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 others assume to start school at 4 years old. In
this
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 essay, I will illustrate both pros and cons. On the one hand, starting school at an early
age
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 can have a pleasant effect. It will enhance their communication skills and increase their imagination.
Moreover
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, they will be able to rely on their selves and
this
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 can have a good effect in the future. At
this
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age
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, their brain is fresh,
thus
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 they will be able to understand information more effortlessly.
Therefore
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,
this
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 method will be reflected over time in their creativity and innovation.
In addition
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, adolescents can discover if they are talented in any sector and can ameliorate
this
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 in the early stage.
For instance
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, In England, they afford free preschools for
children
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.
Hence
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, the
parents
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 can work and not be terrified of keeping them alone.
This
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 increased the productivity in the country.
On the other hand
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, A wide range of individuals are frightened by the idea of keeping their
children
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 away from them. Many mothers care about them and assume that they will bullied by others.
Furthermore
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 , they are convincing that the kid will struggle alone and they can not burden
this
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. Moving
further
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, these things will make the kid keen on their
parents
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. His ability to connect with others will be limited.
For example
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, research from Chigaco University proved that
,
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apply
show examples
 attending
children
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 at a late
age
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 can affect their skills and deteriorate them. In conclusion, the debate on leaving babies at what
age
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 is an issue till now. The government should help the
parents
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 by supplying them with subsidies. They
also
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 can make them leave the work early to see them.

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grammar
Review punctuation and grammar to produce a more polished essay. For instance, 'their selves' should be 'themselves' and 'can ameliorate' can be substituted with 'can improve.'
task achievement
Expand on your points with more specific examples and evidence. This helps solidify your argument and demonstrates comprehensive task achievement.
coherence
Increase the logical flow between paragraphs by using cohesive devices more effectively. This will enhance the overall coherence of the essay.
general
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
introduction
The introduction effectively sets up the discussion, and the conclusion summarizes the main points well.
content
The essay considers both advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view of the topic.
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