In many countries today, the number of plants and animals are declining. •Why is it happening? •What can be done to solve this situation?

Nowadays around the globe, various types of vegetables,
plants
, and
animals
are decreasing in number.
This
unfortunate issue might have numerous reasons. From my perspective,
escalating
Correct article usage
the escalating
show examples
rise in the use of disposable
dishes
and technological advancements are the most crucial,
also
this
essay will outline some beneficial approaches as well. Many city-dwellers
temp
Correct your spelling
tend
show examples
to utilize a large number of disposable
dishes
due to
the fact that they lead their hectic life and work around the clock,
leading
Correct your spelling
leaving
show examples
them no choice. Needless to say, these containers are not eco-friendly and will be left in nature for a long time,
consequently
fewer
plants
and
animals
will
be survived
Wrong verb form
survive
show examples
.
Apart from
this
, improvements in technology have some devastating impacts on various kinds of
plants
and
animals
. To be exact, factories that produce a lot of air pollution affect
ecosystem
Add an article
the ecosystem
show examples
and
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
of the soil,
in particular
,
as a
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
show examples
made
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
the land
impossible
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to cultivate
plants
or raise
newborns
Change the noun form
newborn
show examples
sheep. One practical approach is that governments should shoulder some responsibility.
In other words
, they could enforce new regulations.
For instance
, the stakeholders must use filters to reduce the air pollution.
Additionally
, local people or even social media could
do
Verb problem
take
show examples
some steps in order to decrease the usage of non-recyclable
dishes
by starting some campaigns. In these campaigns, they might show a video clip of a poor animal
that is
alone or a kind of
plants
Fix the agreement mistake
plant
show examples
that is
going to be extinct. All in all, the decreasing number of
plants
and
animals
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
not deniable, and I believe technology and non-recyclable
dishes
are the main causes.
However
, we could tackle
this
issue with the help of governments and people.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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task achievement
Ensure a clear and concise thesis statement in the introduction to set up the main points of the essay more effectively.
task achievement
Develop each main point further with more detailed and precise examples to enhance the comprehensiveness of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices to link ideas more smoothly across the essay.
coherence cohesion
Reorganize some of the ideas to ensure logical progression and connection between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and do a good job of framing the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt effectively by identifying causes and suggesting solutions.
task achievement
There are several relevant and specific examples provided to support the main points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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