Nowadays, shopping online is becoming popular because of its benefits. For example, the consumers can buy books, air tickets or anything they need on the Internet. There are many advantages to this phenomenon. Besides, the drawbacks of shopping online are also a problem. In my opinion, the benefits of buying things on the internet outweigh the disadvantages.

#consumers #books #air #tickets #internet #phenomenon

These days online shopping has

became

Change the verb form

become

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many feel that happiness is mainly an individual responsibility while others feel that there are important external factors. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The government should control the amount of violence in films and televisions in order to decrease violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many famous sports players advertise sports products. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish