Nowadays, shopping online is becoming popular because of its benefits. For example, the consumers can buy books, air tickets or anything they need on the Internet. There are many advantages to this phenomenon. Besides, the drawbacks of shopping online are also a problem. In my opinion, the benefits of buying things on the internet outweigh the disadvantages.

These days online shopping has
became
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become
show examples
most popular among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shoppers worldwide.
Firstly
, the wide
rang
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range
show examples
of
collection
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collections
show examples
, if you visit the store you might see limited
collection
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collections
show examples
. But when you shop online can see
vast
Add an article
a vast
the vast
show examples
collection of products
and
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apply
show examples
from different vendors where you can compare the
better
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best
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price
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prices
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and best
product
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products
show examples
which will suit
into
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apply
show examples
your budget and
requirement
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requirements
show examples
.
Secondly
, Consumers can buy all the products and services
thru
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apply
show examples
online, for
an
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apply
show examples
example food, clothes, medicine, home accessories, air tickets, doctor appointments and many more services without any timeline.
Thus
, people can order the
product
or service
thru
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apply
show examples
online from anywhere and anytime and get the
door step
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doorstep
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delivery.
Therefore
, can avoid unnecessary travelling and save
lot
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a lot
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of time.
Lastly
, the competitive price and offers,
compare
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compared
show examples
to in-store shopping, online prices are much affordable if you buy bulk you will get
attractive
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an attractive
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discount.
On the other
hand
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hand,
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when you do online shopping there
is
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are
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few
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a few
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drawbacks. You have to provide all your personal information.
Such
as name, address, mobile no and bank card details.
Therefore
, So many theft and fraud issues
raised
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are raised
show examples
due to
online
purchase
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purchases
show examples
.
Thus
, many consumers
not
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are not
show examples
interested in online shopping. Another factor is
return
Correct article usage
the return
show examples
and exchange policy. When you buy a
product
in
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apply
show examples
online you never
tried
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try
show examples
or feel it.
Therefore
, when
received
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receive
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the
product
it might not fit
or
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apply
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what you expected, during exchange it will be more complicated and it will not happen immediately
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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to in-store.
In addition
costly
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to costly
show examples
shipping charges and lead time of delivery, some online
site
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sites
show examples
charge high delivery
charge
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charges
show examples
in order to receive the items. Especially will not receive the items on time.
Thus
, having discussed both these aspects carefully.I believe that buying things online
far
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is far
show examples
better
then
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than
show examples
in-store.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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language
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary and varied sentence structures to express your ideas more clearly and effectively.
accuracy
Double-check your work for grammar and spelling mistakes, especially focusing on subject-verb agreement and word forms.
task
Ensure that all parts of the essay question are fully addressed. For example, the introduction could more clearly outline what will be discussed in the essay.
coherence
Link your ideas more smoothly to improve the overall coherence and cohesion. Try using a variety of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your writing.
support
The essay provides relevant examples to support main points, such as specific types of products and services available online.
task response
You successfully highlighted both the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping, ensuring balanced coverage of the topic.
conclusion
A clear conclusion is presented, reiterating the author's opinion that the benefits of online shopping outweigh the drawbacks.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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