"Prevention is better than cure". Researching and treating diseases is too costly so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. To what extent do you agree.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is a wonderful phrase I heard when I was a child , protection from the disease is more important than seeking treatment. I wholeheartedly agree with
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

sentence, I shall elaborate on my point of view in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay. In the beginning, all of us know how the body state is a crucial matter , and why we should not ignore our body without any precautions. Folks have to be motivated in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

section by the
ministery
Correct your spelling
ministry
minister

If you don’t want ministery to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

of health or by parents from childhood Listening to our bodies are very important point , most
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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people ignore signs because of
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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lack of awareness
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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laziness which is driving them to become careless,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they aren't going to
gym
Correct article usage
the gym

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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or practising any physical activity to build up fitness.
in addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, to get off bad habits like smoking or
heavily
Change the word
heavy

Heavily seems to be the wrong part of speech for this context.

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drinking even
they
Correct word choice
if they

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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are
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb are appears to be unnecessary here.

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never
do
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb do appears to be unnecessary here.

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check
up
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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continuously.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the cost of the treatment in the advanced stage is heavier than from the earlier , beside the prognosis of the treatment will
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

decrease i.e in medical terms ( poor prognosis), which means the person will lose more money with the low chance in returning health system like the previous. In conclusion, health statement is a significant matter that we shouldn't neglect
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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. Awareness should be found, by learning and asking how to be a healthy body with high immunity
hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

to be capable of facing viruses and microbes.
in addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

to avoiding bad habits to keep the organs free from any complications and any foreign bodies.

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task response
You have presented a clear position on the topic and have supported it with relevant arguments. However, work on organizing your ideas more effectively to improve logical flow between paragraphs.
task response
Try to further develop your main points with more specific examples and evidence. Providing concrete examples will strengthen your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay would benefit from clearer transitions between ideas to enhance readability. Use transitional words and phrases to link your points more cohesively.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of grammar errors and awkward phrasing, which can disrupt clarity. Practice writing more complex sentences correctly.
task response
Your introduction clearly states your position on the topic and sets up your essay effectively.
coherence and cohesion
You have a conclusion that summarizes your main points and reinforces your argument.
task response
Your ideas are generally clear and you have a solid understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • proactive
  • preventive measures
  • lifestyle diseases
  • public health
  • healthcare expenditure
  • cost-effective
  • chronic conditions
  • early detection
  • immunization
  • health promotion
  • risk factors
  • non-communicable diseases
  • disease surveillance
  • preventive diagnostics
  • health literacy
  • universal healthcare
  • primary prevention
  • secondary prevention
  • tertiary prevention
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