IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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The growing advancement of the Internet has made it more popular for
people
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 to gain
information
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 online and replaced
newspapers
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. I partially agree with
this
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, for the increasing convenience provided by online
news
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 regardless of the fact that
newspapers
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 still play a significant role for some
people
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 who are unable to use modern gadgets. On the one hand, the Internet has made
newspapers
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 more outdated
due to
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 the rapid advancement of online
information
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.
In other words
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,
people
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 no longer need to carry
newspapers
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 in their bags and search for particular
information
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 on the spread paper.
Moreover
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, a fast connection to networks in a recent society allows
people
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 to access whatever
information
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of
Change preposition
about
show examples
 their interests and
bobbies
Correct your spelling
hobbies
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 in an
instance
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instant
show examples
.
For example
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, online
news
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 platforms
such
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 as Yahoo and Google are dominantly used by many individuals around the world because they offer hundreds of sources of
news
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 in seconds, helping those with tight schedules to cope without having trouble searching.
This
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 promotes their better understanding of the facts of their nations and the world, making an incredible contribution to the analysis of some problems and generating creative ideas and solutions in a more limited time.
Thus
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, the incredible improvement of online
news
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 has made
newspapers
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 less popular and attractive.
On the other hand
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,
newspapers
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 will not be replaced by online
information
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 completely as they are still in great demand by some
people
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 who do not know how to use modern technology to their own advantage. Indeed, many seniors are still reliant on
newspapers
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 as they often feel frustrated or disappointed by the excessive amount of services that smartphones and computers provide, which they cannot handle in daily life.
Therefore
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, the traditional style of reading
newspapers
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 is more suited to their needs as they get used to it.
Furthermore
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, they are more likely to concentrate on each article as
newspapers
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 have much fewer distractions than online
information
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 which often comes with the floods of advertisements.
Consequently
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, the elderly tend to regard
newspapers
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 as a necessary means of obtaining
information
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. In conclusion, I somewhat agree that the growing popularity of the Internet has decreased the importance of
newspapers
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due to
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 the increasing easiness of online
information
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.
However
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,
newspapers
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 will survive as they are demanded by many seniors who are unable to use technological devices
as well as
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 young adults.

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task achievement
Your essay shows a good understanding of the topic, and you provide a balanced response by considering both sides of the argument. However, your examples could be more specific and connect more clearly to the main points. Additionally, a bit more variety in sentence structures would enhance clarity and engagement.
coherence and cohesion
Some paragraphs could be more tightly structured, and transitions between sentences can be smoother. Improve logical flow by ensuring each paragraph clearly links to the next.
introduction and conclusion present
The introduction effectively sets the stage for the essay, and the conclusion nicely wraps up your arguments.
complete response
You provide multiple perspectives on the topic, which adds depth to your discussion. This demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the issue.
logical structure
Your ideas are well-organized, and you maintain clarity throughout most of the essay.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Access
  • Convenient
  • Fast
  • Expensive
  • Wider range
  • News sources
  • Perspectives
  • Readership
  • Demographics
  • Physical
  • Tangible
  • Reading experience
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