IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue can be solved?

#countries #animals #plants
The are
Correct article usage
a numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
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 of nations, where habitation is decreasing day
be
Correct your spelling
by
show examples
 day.
According to
 my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 new inventions could be the greatest
reasion
Correct your spelling
reason
 behind
this
.
This
 essay will elaborate
the
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on the
show examples
 reason and the possible solution that will reduce the risk of deforestation.
Firstly
,
high voltage
Add a hyphen
high-voltage
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 devices harm natural
habitat
Fix the agreement mistake
habitats
show examples
. Rays passing through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gadgets
such
 as mobile phones play a vital role
to damage
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in damaging
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 the environment. To elaborate, the usage of cell phones
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 quite high
as compare
Change preposition
compared
show examples
 to
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 decade. Everyone has communication devices nowadays
wheather
Correct your spelling
whether
weather
person
Correct article usage
a person
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 is a
teenage
Replace the word
teenager
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 or mature.
On the other hand
,
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
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 of the network is
also
 improved which will impact
sevearly
Correct your spelling
severely
 on birds and forest
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
For instance
,
5
Correct article usage
the 5
show examples
G (5th Generation) network announced a couple of years ago,
is
Verb problem
has
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 made
birds
Change noun form
birds'
bird's
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 miserable. only half of the habitat left as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
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 to 2020 data.
Thus
, no doubt new
invention
Fix the agreement mistake
inventions
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 assist human life
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to comfortable
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comfortable
Change the word
comfortably
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 and
luxuary
Correct your spelling
luxury
, but
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 drawbacks on wildlife can not be avoided. Moving forward to the solution, awareness can be a way to overcome
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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concequences
Correct your spelling
consequences
consequence
.
Government
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The government
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 of the States can help society
to launch
Change preposition
by launching
show examples
 some programs which will spread knowledge about
merits
Correct article usage
the merits
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 and demerits of technology. To explain
this
, individuals are unaware
behind
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the new goods and
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 materials.
For example
,
headline
Correct article usage
a headline
show examples
 published in the Times India newspaper, 70
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the population
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 no knowledge
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introduction conclusion present
Your essay should begin with a clear introduction and end with a conclusion. Summarize the key points you will discuss and then revisit them at the end of the essay.
logical structure
Make sure each main point in your essay directly supports your thesis statement. Use clear topic sentences to introduce each paragraph.
supported main points
Expand on your examples to clearly illustrate your points. Ensure that each example is connected to the main idea of the paragraph.
complete response
You've correctly identified that technological advancements can have negative effects on wildlife.
relevant specific examples
Using real-world examples such as the impact of 5G on birds shows a good attempt to incorporate relevant specific examples.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • urbanization
  • deforestation
  • agricultural expansion
  • pollution control
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable practices
  • overexploitation
  • invasive species
  • conservation
  • quarantine measures
  • eradication programs
  • public awareness campaigns
  • habitat destruction
  • climate change
  • natural habitats
  • species decline
What to do next:
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