IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

You share a parking area with several neighbours and have recently started having problems. Write a letter to be copied to all neighbours that share the parking area. In that letter • explaining the problems • suggesting ways to help the situation • proposing a possible meeting You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Neighbours,

#area #neighbours #situation #addresses
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Dear Neighbours, I am a resident of B-904 and writing
this
 letter to all of you to express my concern related to the parking issues.
To begin
 with, as you know some of the residents have two cars which are either personally owned or provided by the company. These people park both their cars under the parking shed.
Therefore
, people like us who come late from the office do not get a parking space.
Hence
, I am a bit concerned and thinking of implementing some rules which could support every resident to get the parking without any problem. I am recommending writing a flat number under each parking slot, and, for those who have two cars, let's have one car park in the ground area. In view of the above, I am requesting a meeting with all the building's residents next Sunday at 6:00 PM to discuss my proposal and any other opinions and decide the way forward. I am sure that we will come out with suitable solutions for
such
 difficulties. I am looking forward to hearing and meeting from you. Yours sincerely, Rob Steve,
Submitted by ahv on

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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure, consider explicitly introducing each of the main points outlined in your prompt: explaining the problems, suggesting ways to help the situation, and proposing a meeting. This will make your argument clearer to the reader.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the greeting and closing, ensure that both are handled with equal attention to detail. The closing is well-done; ensure the opening sets a similarly inviting tone.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should focus on a single idea for better clarity. While the overall structure is sound, refining this can elevate your writing further.
task achievement
Your task response is strong but could be even more compelling by providing some specific consequences of the current parking issue to underline the urgency.
task achievement
To improve the completeness of your response, you may want to set the context better by briefly mentioning how long this issue has been occurring or its frequency.
suitable writing tone
The tone of the letter is polite and considerate, which is appropriate for addressing neighbours about a community issue.
single idea per paragraph
You've kept each of your points clear and identifiable, aiding the reader's comprehension.
task achievement
The closing paragraph nicely wraps up the letter and clearly specifies your intentions for a meeting, which is a strong task achievement.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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