nowdays,growing number of people with health problems are trying to find alternative medicine or treatments instead of visiting a doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development. give reasons for your answer and inculed any relavent examples from your own knowledge or experience
There is no denying the fact that there is an increased figure of
individules
Correct your spelling
individuals
have
Correct pronoun usage
who have
health
issues and people have thought about Use synonyms
alternative
way of treatments rather than Add an article
an alternative
the alternative
Use synonyms
visit
a Wrong verb form
visiting
speciallist
. Correct your spelling
specialist
this
essay will discuss Linking Words
negative
and positive of that Correct article usage
the negative
improvment
.
Correct your spelling
improvement
to begin
Linking Words
with
there are many positive ways of treatment Add a comma
with,
form
problems Correct your spelling
for
health
.Use synonyms
Firstly
Linking Words
while
the world have been developed and Linking Words
also
the Linking Words
technolgy
there are several Correct your spelling
technology
alternative
Change to a plural noun
alternatives
of
going to Change preposition
to
Use synonyms
doctor
, there are Add an article
the doctor
a doctor
technolgy
nowadays Correct your spelling
technology
have
the ability to Correct subject-verb agreement
has
guied
you and tell you what should you do when have that problem.Correct your spelling
guide
In other words
, Al one of the main examples of that idea it Linking Words
express
to you ways of Change the verb form
expresses
prevent
Wrong verb form
preventing
health
problems and Use synonyms
also
could give you some of the organic treatments Linking Words
beased
on your Correct your spelling
based
health
Use synonyms
condiction
Correct your spelling
condition
Fix the infinitive
to encourge
encourge
your body to recover faster . Correct your spelling
encourage
in addition
, there Linking Words
are
a drop in the ratio of Change the verb form
is
patiants
that Correct your spelling
patients
visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
doctor
for any Use synonyms
health
problem they Use synonyms
instead
cure Linking Words
themselvs
from the natuer resources and they thought there Correct your spelling
themselves
is
no need for Wrong verb form
was
speciallist
Correct article usage
a speciallist
according to
Linking Words
study
made in Japan in 2019. Add an article
a study
the study
for example
, there are many people Linking Words
Correct pronoun usage
who used
used
the old way of curing by going to Wrong verb form
use
Add an article
the forest
forest
to eat some organic Fix the agreement mistake
forests
freash
food that could help to make them feel better.
In terms Correct your spelling
fresh
od
negative, doctors could be helpful. It is Correct your spelling
of
also
possible to say that Linking Words
Use synonyms
doctor
would be a great benefit for the patient Correct article usage
a doctor
due to
the knowledge that they have and there would be Linking Words
nasscery
to have Correct your spelling
mastery
Use synonyms
doctor
in some cases.Add an article
a doctor
Moreover
,people could not prefer to Linking Words
visit
a Use synonyms
doctor
in hospitals so Use synonyms
speciallist
in some countries can Correct your spelling
specialists
visit
the patient . for Use synonyms
instane
, in Correct your spelling
instance
China
there are several hospitals that Add a comma
China,
motiviate
Correct your spelling
motivate
the
Correct article usage
apply
docotr
to see Correct your spelling
doctors
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
on
Change preposition
at
thier
Correct your spelling
their
house
so that would be more comfortable for many of the Fix the agreement mistake
houses
soceity
.
in conclusion,there are many Correct your spelling
society
beneifts
from using new ways Correct your spelling
benefits
for
treatment it is Change preposition
of
also
true that in some cases there Linking Words
have
to be a Change the verb form
has
doctor
and it is not bad to Use synonyms
visit
him.Use synonyms
Submitted by almutairi.a.257 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Grammar and Sentence Structure
Your essay needs better grammatical accuracy and sentence structure. Try to avoid run-on sentences and make sure your sentences are clear and concise.
Supporting Examples
Include more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. Try to use examples that directly relate to your main points.
Structure and Organization
Your ideas are present but they need to be organized more logically. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your essay has a clear logical progression.
Task Response
You have addressed both positive and negative aspects of the topic, which shows good understanding of different viewpoints.
Conclusion
Your conclusion summarizes your main points effectively, providing closure to your essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example