It must be a woman who stays at home to care for children. Men are not suited to this kind of work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.
Gender
roles in taking care of children is a topic which is having a lot of discussion these days. I completely disagree with the statement that Use synonyms
women
need to be stay-at-home moms and that Use synonyms
men
are not good enough for childcare. Use synonyms
This
disagreement is because increase in Linking Words
gender
equality and changes in family structures.
Modern society is moving towards Use synonyms
gender
equality Use synonyms
at
homes and Change preposition
in
workplace
where Fix the agreement mistake
workplaces
men
and Use synonyms
women
are working equally to earn. With Use synonyms
this
rise, it is important to not assign certain roles to a particular Linking Words
gender
Use synonyms
instead
work can be divided equally among the family. To illustrate Linking Words
this
, in India, 55% of Linking Words
women
in metropolitan cities are working alongside Use synonyms
men
to provide for their families. Use synonyms
However
, the families of these Linking Words
women
are expecting them to take responsibility for their Use synonyms
kids
after work with little to no support from their spouses.
The change in family structures is another big reason for my disagreement. Society is moving towards nuclear families where the Use synonyms
kids
are not getting any kind of support from their grandparents. Use synonyms
Additionally
, stay-at-home dads and dual-income households are taking Linking Words
this
taboo from the wives in taking care of the children. Linking Words
For example
, in recent years the percentage of fathers who are taking the initiative of childcare by staying at home is increasing gradually. Where it is estimated that Linking Words
men
in 3 of 10 households are interested in staying at home and raising their Use synonyms
kids
. It is Use synonyms
also
worth mentioning that skills for caregiving are not inherently tied to male or female and that many Linking Words
men
are capable of nurturing and taking responsibility for their Use synonyms
kids
.
In conclusion, the stereotype that mothers are responsible for nurturing their children and that fathers are not capable is a wrong statement. Use synonyms
This
is because of the rise in fathers staying at home and dual-income households and the increase in Linking Words
gender
equality where wives are expected to earn.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical structure of your essay. While your main ideas are clear, try to ensure each paragraph logically flows to the next. Consider using more transitional phrases to connect your ideas smoothly.
task achievement
Your response is complete and clear, but you could further elaborate on some points. Providing additional details or nuance, especially in your examples, will strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly states your position and sets up the essay well. This helps the reader understand your standpoint from the beginning.
task achievement
You provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, which enhances the credibility of your argument.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite