Some people believe that nowadays there are too many choices. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

#people #choices

Some guys consider that these days we have a various of options.

This

essay agrees with

this

idea because, in

this

modern century we have lots of possibilities to get a good job with satisfying income.

In addition

, technological advancement in

this

era gives them opportunity to think that we have a too many choices.

Also

, a vast number of manufactured goods, that had been very useful for our societies and lifestyle. Because of

this

developments, several individuals believe that right now we have a very good occasion to choose our alternatives. The technical industry has decreased until the 2000-2001, But after 2010’s all kind of technology was developed and increased.

For example

: Samsung Heavy Industries (the world's second largest shipbuilder measured by 2010 revenues),and Samsung Engineering and Samsung C&T Corporation (respectively the world's 13th and 36th largest construction companies).So, thats why some popularity assume for diversity of pick. To summarise, that high-tech culture is developing multivariable for our future generations.

This

makes it clear, in the other hand, currently we have numerous alternatives for living: we live and will live in a high flexibility era.

Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on Mon Jul 08 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

You've made a good start by addressing the topic, but it would benefit from more structured and clear arguments. Ensure each paragraph has a single main idea supported by details and examples.

coherence cohesion

Your essay would benefit from smoother transitions and more logical progression between ideas. The current structure is somewhat fragmented.

task achievement

Ensure examples are directly relevant and clearly explained to strengthen your argument. For instance, explaining how technological advancements create choices would provide a clearer connection to your main point.

coherence cohesion

Some sentences are unclear due to grammatical errors. Try to review your work to correct issues that might obscure your meaning.

coherence cohesion

You've introduced and concluded your essay, which helps to frame your argument.

task achievement

The essay topic is directly addressed throughout, showing a good understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

186 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

overwhelmed
decision fatigue
paralysis by analysis
consumerism
globalization
personal autonomy
market saturation
option overload
decision-making process
psychological well-being
buyer's remorse
customization
trade-offs
minimalism
information superhighway

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?
Nowadays, the amount of flora and fauna is at a great risk of extinction. While various factors such as the increase in global warming and deforestation have contributed to the above situation, alleviating this problem would involve reducing carbon footprints and imposing strict laws and regulations.
7
band
In many city, planner tend to arrange shops schools, officies and homes in a specific area and separated them each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh disadvantages.
It is observed that commercial, educational, business and residential areas are split these days. In this essay, I will demonstrate that the advantages of this establishment supersede the downsides.
7.5
band
Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is an argument that it is better to study with classmates in a classroom rather than learn online at home. I totally agree with this statement.
4.5
band
“Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up.” To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The role of parenthood should be equal, mothers deciding to have the baby, often leads to them controlling how the child is brought up. It is agreed that both parents have crucial roles but ultimately the mother has the most influencial role. In this essay, I will discuss how the mother and father's influence is crucial on an offspring, but generally, mother's have the most responsibility in the child's upbringing and spend most of the time with them.
5
band
the plans show how a coastal land has developed into coastal park
The maps describe the transformation of coastal land into a park.

Some people believe that nowadays there are too many choices. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

In many city, planner tend to arrange shops schools, officies and homes in a specific area and separated them each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh disadvantages.

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

“Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up.” To what extent do you agree or disagree?

the plans show how a coastal land has developed into coastal park