IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Today's society is based on laws and rules. It can't function well if individuals are free to do whatever they want. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, our
society
Use synonyms
 is
basend
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based
 on
under
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rules and regulations. Some say that
society
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 cannot function properly when
people
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 have more
freedom
Use synonyms
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 they can do anything. I
stronlgly
Correct your spelling
strongly
 agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because it creates more crimes and
voilences
Correct your spelling
violence
violences
,
this
Linking Words
 essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons. To commence with, law and order is the most
significance
Replace the word
significant
show examples
 of
society
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 without following it properly
which
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 can bring enormous amounts of crimes,
consequently
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,
people
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 will
loss
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lose
show examples
 their possessions,
assests
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assets
 and
jewelleries
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jewellery
pieces of jewellery
show examples
, which many
thiefs
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thieves
show examples
 and culprits are brought by over
freedom
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 of the population. No one wants to go work and earn money for their
livinglihood
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livelihood
instead
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 of they can easily
takes
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take
show examples
 wealth from others.
For example
Linking Words
, the USA has
more
Correct word choice
higher
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 crime rates than any other
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
nations
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nation
show examples
 because of the
over
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apply
show examples
freedom
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 and the laws are more comfortable for the culprits.
Hence
Linking Words
, laws should be followed by the public
besides
Linking Words
 crime rates
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
 increased tremendously.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, unstrict laws bring
voilences
Correct your spelling
violence
violences
 among the
popualtion
Correct your spelling
population
, everyone might be ruled
the
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by the
show examples
 nations and
attacking to
Wrong verb form
attack
show examples
 others without any intentions, which
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
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 they are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
powerful persons. Increasing the
rowdy's
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rowdy
show examples
 ratio and many might be killed by them,
innnocents
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innocent
innocents
people
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also
Linking Words
 suffer to
dies
Wrong verb form
die
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, many African
nation's folks
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nations
show examples
 are killed the other parts of the world
people
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 when
tehy
Correct your spelling
they
 enter
in
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apply
show examples
their
forest
Fix the agreement mistake
forests
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 and island
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 because they do not adhere
any
Change preposition
to any
show examples
 rules and regulations. Henceforth, liberal legal acts might
be increased
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
 the
violences
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violence
acts of violence
outbreaks of violence
show examples
 among the public. In conclusion, law and order
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 of the utmost importance
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 every
society
Use synonyms
, if do not follow these acts properly it creates
more
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
crimes
Change the noun form
crime
show examples
 rates and a large number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 might be affected
as well as
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
increases
more violences
Fix the agreement mistake
violence
show examples
 among the population.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because
over
Add a hyphen
over-freedom
show examples
freedom
Use synonyms
 can bring more detrimental effects on
society
Use synonyms
.

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Grammar and Spelling
Make sure to proofread your essay for spelling and grammatical errors to enhance clarity. For instance, correct misspellings like 'basend,' 'voilences,' 'thiefs,' and 'innnocents.'
Examples
Strengthen your argument by providing clearer and more varied examples. Try to include data, studies, or historical references rather than just general statements.
Structure and Organization
Enhance the clarity of your points by organizing your paragraphs better. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and is well-developed.
Consistency
You have a clear stance on the topic and argue it consistently throughout your essay.
Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are present and summarize your main points well.
Supporting Points
You included relevant points on how freedom could lead to crime and violence, supporting your main argument.
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