Today's society is based on laws and rules. It can't function well if individuals are free to do whatever they want. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, our
society
is
basend
Correct your spelling
based
on
under
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rules and regulations. Some say that
society
cannot function properly when
people
have more
freedom
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
they can do anything. I
stronlgly
Correct your spelling
strongly
agree with
this
statement because it creates more crimes and
voilences
Correct your spelling
violence
violences
,
this
essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons. To commence with, law and order is the most
significance
Replace the word
significant
show examples
of
society
without following it properly
which
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
can bring enormous amounts of crimes,
consequently
,
people
will
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
their possessions,
assests
Correct your spelling
assets
and
jewelleries
Change the wording
jewellery
pieces of jewellery
show examples
, which many
thiefs
Correct your spelling
thieves
show examples
and culprits are brought by over
freedom
of the population. No one wants to go work and earn money for their
livinglihood
Correct your spelling
livelihood
instead
of they can easily
takes
Change the verb form
take
show examples
wealth from others.
For example
, the USA has
more
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
crime rates than any other
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
nations
Fix the agreement mistake
nation
show examples
because of the
over
Change preposition
apply
show examples
freedom
and the laws are more comfortable for the culprits.
Hence
, laws should be followed by the public
besides
crime rates
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
increased tremendously.
Furthermore
, unstrict laws bring
voilences
Correct your spelling
violence
violences
among the
popualtion
Correct your spelling
population
, everyone might be ruled
the
Change preposition
by the
show examples
nations and
attacking to
Wrong verb form
attack
show examples
others without any intentions, which
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
they are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
powerful persons. Increasing the
rowdy's
Change noun form
rowdy
show examples
ratio and many might be killed by them,
innnocents
Correct your spelling
innocent
innocents
people
also
suffer to
dies
Wrong verb form
die
show examples
.
For instance
, many African
nation's folks
Change noun form
nations
show examples
are killed the other parts of the world
people
when
tehy
Correct your spelling
they
enter
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
forest
Fix the agreement mistake
forests
show examples
and island
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
because they do not adhere
any
Change preposition
to any
show examples
rules and regulations. Henceforth, liberal legal acts might
be increased
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
the
violences
Change the wording
violence
acts of violence
outbreaks of violence
show examples
among the public. In conclusion, law and order
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
of the utmost importance
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
every
society
, if do not follow these acts properly it creates
more
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
crimes
Change the noun form
crime
show examples
rates and a large number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
might be affected
as well as
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
increases
more violences
Fix the agreement mistake
violence
show examples
among the population.
Therefore
, I strongly agree with
this
statement because
over
Add a hyphen
over-freedom
show examples
freedom
can bring more detrimental effects on
society
.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Grammar and Spelling
Make sure to proofread your essay for spelling and grammatical errors to enhance clarity. For instance, correct misspellings like 'basend,' 'voilences,' 'thiefs,' and 'innnocents.'
Examples
Strengthen your argument by providing clearer and more varied examples. Try to include data, studies, or historical references rather than just general statements.
Structure and Organization
Enhance the clarity of your points by organizing your paragraphs better. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and is well-developed.
Consistency
You have a clear stance on the topic and argue it consistently throughout your essay.
Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are present and summarize your main points well.
Supporting Points
You included relevant points on how freedom could lead to crime and violence, supporting your main argument.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!