some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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this

Linking Words

contemporary epoch, a large proportion of guardians prefer to purchase a large number of

toys

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for their little ones so that their

kids

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can keep themselves busy in their free

time

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This

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essay will delve into the benefits and drawbacks of

this

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scenario on the minds of

children

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To begin

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with, the most prominent benefit of

this

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approach is that these playable items do not allow the

children

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to feel bored during the

time

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of their

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parents

Change noun form

parent's

parents'

show examples

work as they can keep themselves busy with these.

Moreover

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toys

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allow the

parents

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to concentrate on their jobs as they know their

kids

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are safe and busy at home. Some

toys

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help to enhance of knowledge of

children

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such

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as abacas and atlas. These play a vital role in teaching the students hard theories in an easy and reliable manner.

However

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children

Use synonyms

will not be attached to their guardians from their hearts as they are not able to spend quality

time

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with them,

thus

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, they will feel more comfortable and attached to non-living things.

This

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leads to a generation gap in society.

Although

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parents

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try to keep their teenagers busy

while

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they are away

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

providing them with too many

toys

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will disturb their habits and concentration towards their academics.

Therefore

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, it is apparent why many

parents

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do not consider buying too many

toys

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for their adults as a useful approach. As every coin has two sides head and tail,

similarly

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every aspect has two sides, buying too many

toys

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could make juveniles busy and

parents

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stress-free during their office hours, but it could lead to

condition

Add an article

a condition

the condition

show examples

of loneliness among the

children

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which is a major cause of generation gap in society.

To conclude

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, as per the statements mentioned above it is crystal clear that busying too many

toys

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for the

kids

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does not always affect them positively. Because all

kids

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do not have the same thinking capability, some might take it as positive action from their parent's side

while

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some might consider it negatively that they do not want to free

time

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for them

thus

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, they want them to be busy with non-living items.

ss6802125Mon Jul 08 2024

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task achievement

In some sections, the ideas aren't fully developed or specific. Offering more detailed examples can strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

You can better organize your essay by ensuring each paragraph is more connected. Use transitional phrases to link ideas smoothly.

task achievement

Some arguments could be clearer, especially in the body paragraphs. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main point that's well supported.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively present your main points.

task achievement

You have made effective points regarding the advantages and disadvantages of children having too many toys.

coherence cohesion

Your language is largely accurate, which makes your essay easy to understand.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

5.5

Logical structure

6.5

Introduction & conclusion present

5.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

5.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

355 words

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some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.

Some people say that adversiting is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the art and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?