some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

In
this
contemporary epoch, a large proportion of guardians prefer to purchase a large number of
toys
for their little ones so that their
kids
can keep themselves busy in their free
time
.
This
essay will delve into the benefits and drawbacks of
this
scenario on the minds of
children
.
To begin
with, the most prominent benefit of
this
approach is that these playable items do not allow the
children
to feel bored during the
time
of their
parents
Change noun form
parent's
parents'
show examples
work as they can keep themselves busy with these.
Moreover
,
toys
allow the
parents
to concentrate on their jobs as they know their
kids
are safe and busy at home. Some
toys
help to enhance of knowledge of
children
such
as abacas and atlas. These play a vital role in teaching the students hard theories in an easy and reliable manner.
However
,
children
will not be attached to their guardians from their hearts as they are not able to spend quality
time
with them,
thus
, they will feel more comfortable and attached to non-living things.
This
leads to a generation gap in society.
Although
,
parents
try to keep their teenagers busy
while
they are away
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
providing them with too many
toys
will disturb their habits and concentration towards their academics.
Therefore
, it is apparent why many
parents
do not consider buying too many
toys
for their adults as a useful approach. As every coin has two sides head and tail,
similarly
every aspect has two sides, buying too many
toys
could make juveniles busy and
parents
stress-free during their office hours, but it could lead to
condition
Add an article
a condition
the condition
show examples
of loneliness among the
children
which is a major cause of generation gap in society.
To conclude
, as per the statements mentioned above it is crystal clear that busying too many
toys
for the
kids
does not always affect them positively. Because all
kids
do not have the same thinking capability, some might take it as positive action from their parent's side
while
some might consider it negatively that they do not want to free
time
for them
thus
, they want them to be busy with non-living items.
Submitted by ss6802125 on

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In some sections, the ideas aren't fully developed or specific. Offering more detailed examples can strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Some arguments could be clearer, especially in the body paragraphs. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main point that's well supported.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively present your main points.
task achievement
You have made effective points regarding the advantages and disadvantages of children having too many toys.
coherence cohesion
Your language is largely accurate, which makes your essay easy to understand.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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