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Band 7

Some people say that advertisement encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Other say that advertisement tells us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoints do you agvreee with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

#people #advertisement #products #lives #viewpoints #agvreee #support
The debate on how advertisement attracts us to make choices has garnered considerable attention with opinions sharply divided.
According to
 some, promoting things these days encourages us to buy extra stuff
that is
 of no use
on the other hand
 some people think that advertisement helps us make choices easier. I partially agree with both statements and I will discuss how advertisement has affected our choices in the forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
 with, in
this
 digital era, we have a lot of options and alternatives whenever a new product is released by a company it spreads like a fire in a jungle
due to
advertisements
 and platforms like social media and fields like graphic
designing
Replace the word
design
show examples
 have made promoting things very fast and accessible.Things are promoted in a manner that emotionally and mentally attracts us and diverts our minds like we need
this
 thing and in the end we buy it.
For example
,
advertisements
 like sales and flat 50 % off
plays
Fix the agreement mistake
play
show examples
 with the human mind and people think it is cheaper and buy it
although
, it is just a mind game nothing else.
On the other hand
, it has made lives much easier we do not have to visit stores all the time and travel a long distance to buy anything
due to
 various platforms like social media
advertisements
 everything is just one click away. We get easily informed by every new product in the market and can make comparisons to which one we want to choose.
To sum up
, both views are valid
advertisements
 help us make decisions and on the flip side they manipulate us to buy extra stuff so it depends on us how we have to choose wisely.
Submitted by sananayyab91 on

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Structure
To improve your score, try to provide a clearer structure by introducing your main points in the introduction. This will help readers understand the direction of your argument from the beginning.
Linking Words
Consider using a wider range of linking words to enhance the flow between ideas. This will not only improve cohesion but also make your essay more engaging.
Accuracy
Proofread your essay for small typos and spelling mistakes. Correcting these will polish your work and potentially improve your score.
Balanced Argument
You effectively discussed both sides of the argument, showing a balanced understanding of the topic.
Effective Conclusion
Your conclusion neatly summarizes the essay's main points, reinforcing your argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuasive power
  • impulse buying
  • awareness
  • innovations
  • perceived needs
  • artificially generated
  • educational aspect
  • informed decisions
  • social media and influencer marketing
  • non-essential luxury items
  • competitive market
  • visibility
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