Shopping online is getting more and more popular in recent years. E-commerce becomes one of the most vibrant industries that represent for new ear of technology. In this essay, drawbacks and benefits of shopping online will be discussed in further details

These days, technology is developing extremely fast;
thereafter
, online shops are the famous way to buy
things
from anywhere.
In addition
, these industries are
one
aspect of new technology.
however
, shopping online has some disadvantages, but I believe that these cannot overshadow the merits. On the
one
hand, when you buy your devices online ,
then
you can use several advantages.
Firstly
, your choices for
one
thing climb.
In other words
,
people
living in small towns do not have access to malls to see different versions of
one
tool;
although
, websites that sell equipment are a lot and you can find
things
which you like a lot;
then
the shopkeeper sends your goods to your house by poste organizations.
Secondly
, you spend neither time nor money because you do not need to go to a bazaar to find the store;
moreover
,
people
who have online shops, most of whom the price are cheaper than stores in the shop centre.
On the other hand
,
this
way of buying has various demerits.
Initially
, most of the shopping centres are closed
due to
the fact they do not have any clients, society who are not able to work with the Internet cannot buy
things
or some
people
who feel relaxed when they go to the bazaar lose their calm .
Also
, when in some evidence inhabitants of
one
country do not have a network for many days;
hence
,
people
who need essential devices cannot buy them. In conclusion, every happens that becomes common in the world has some bad points;
nevertheless
, these effects cannot eclipse the good points;
furthermore
, online shops obtain some population works, yet
this
happens to let a large group of
people
buy
things
with diverse items.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To enhance your coherence and cohesion, aim for a clearer logical progression of ideas. This means ensuring each paragraph flows smoothly from one point to the next.
task achievement
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your main points. This will help to strengthen your argument and provide concrete evidence for your claims.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present and summarize the main points of your essay well.
task achievement
You made an effort to discuss both advantages and disadvantages of online shopping, giving a balanced view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: