Some people think that the range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich people and poor people. Others think that it is causing the opposite effect. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Well, we have two maps which allow us to observe the changes and rearrangements of
a
Cambridge Central Library. On the upper Correct article usage
apply
side
it is a map that was used 20 years ago, and on the bottom Add a comma
side,
side
it is another map which is now in service.
At first glance, the arrangements of walls and the forms of rooms immediately Add a comma
side,
catches
the eye. Over the period of twenty years, the area Correct subject-verb agreement
catch
is
not changed considerably and there Verb problem
has
is
almost no new sections.
First of all, I should notice that Change the verb form
are
administration
of Cambridge Correct article usage
the administration
take
care Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
about
their students which is why we can see Change preposition
of
Café
is opened and Correct article usage
the Café
space
for it is widened. Correct article usage
the space
Consequently
, tables on
the centre are demolished but there are new computing Change preposition
in
section
on the east side.
Fix the agreement mistake
sections
Additionally
, a lot of changes in the locations of rooms take place in order to achieve site optimization. Finally
, the last
important thing is doors and how people need to open them. They add one new door and turn the south-west
room’s door closer to the entrance.Correct your spelling
southwest
Submitted by dulskywork on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
In your introduction, be clearer about what the essay aims to do. Write an introduction that indicates the purpose of the essay clearly. For example, mention that you will discuss the changes observed in the Cambridge Central Library over a period of 20 years.
task achievement
Provide specific details about the changes and rearrangements observed in the Cambridge Central Library. Mention specific rooms or areas that have changed and include their previous and current locations or purposes. This will make your examples more relevant and specific.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure there is a clear conclusion that summarizes your findings and provides a final perspective. Currently, the essay lacks a clear concluding statement.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the coherence of your essay by ensuring each paragraph logically follows from the previous one. For instance, provide smooth transitions between discussing the café and the computing section. This can be achieved by using linking words or phrases.
task achievement
The introduction sets the context of the essay by mentioning the two maps of Cambridge Central Library, making it clear what will be discussed.
task achievement
You have identified some of the major changes, such as the café being opened and the new computing section, which shows an understanding of the task.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with an introduction and body paragraphs that cover different aspects of the library’s changes.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!