In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

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In several countries,

university

Use synonyms

students

Use synonyms

live with their families

during

Correct word choice

while

show examples

they pursue their

degree

Fix the agreement mistake

degrees

show examples

while

Linking Words

some

students

Use synonyms

in other nations prefer to study in another city.

This

Linking Words

essay will examine the

advantages

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and disadvantages of living away from home when they study at

university

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. There are several

advantages

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of living away from their family home. One benefit is self-control. Those

students

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have

Correct pronoun usage

who have

show examples

learnt how to control themselves

due to

Linking Words

something are over-underrated.

For example

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, it is general that in the

university

Use synonyms

students

Use synonyms

will have some

arguements

Correct your spelling

arguments

with their peers so self-control is

predominant

Correct article usage

the predominant

show examples

key to

address

Wrong verb form

addressing

show examples

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

because they can not call

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their parents to solve that problem. Financial management

also

Linking Words

count

Change the verb form

counts

show examples

benefit

Add an article

a benefit

show examples

, when

people

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leave

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

, they

were spent

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

all things by themselves.

Thus

Linking Words

, they figure out to learn to how to control their monthly income to spend on all bills including rental, utility,

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

food, etc.

Change preposition

For

show examples

this

Linking Words

reason,

people

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tend to manage their expenses wisely. Despite these

advantages

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of staying

from

Rephrase

away from

show examples

family, there are a few disadvantages as well. Some

people

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will have mental health issues.

For instance

Linking Words

, international

students

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migrant

Replace the word

migrate

show examples

from their home countries to

chasing

Wrong verb form

chase

show examples

their higher education but they get

Remove the article

apply

show examples

discrimination from other folks in the class

Change preposition

show examples

skin

color

Change the spelling

colour

show examples

, accent as a clear

exmple

Correct your spelling

example

so they will get

lose

Wrong verb form

lost

show examples

immidiately

Correct your spelling

immediately

. Unfortunately, some of them reach

Change preposition

apply

show examples

mental health

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

Furthermore

Linking Words

, loneliness, a majority of

international

Correct your spelling

internationals

show examples

have

met

Verb problem

experienced

show examples

this

Linking Words

situation

Change preposition

for

show examples

some reason,

for example

Linking Words

, when they get sick, nobody

look

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looks

show examples

after them which is the reason lead to have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

loneliness condition. In conclusion, I

strong

Change the word

strongly

show examples

believe that

Use synonyms

advantages

Correct article usage

the advantages

show examples

of living out from family during

university

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study

outweight

Correct your spelling

outweigh

the

disadvatage

Correct your spelling

disadvantage

disadvantages

People

Use synonyms

will build their self-control to be stronger, and manage

finance

Fix the agreement mistake

finances

show examples

wisely,

however

Linking Words

, there are some disadvantages

such

Linking Words

as mental health issues, and loneliness condition.

Date Wed Jul 10 2024

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task achievement

The introduction is clear but could be more concise. Also, consider adding a thesis statement to clearly outline the stance taken.

task achievement

Ensure to proofread the essay to avoid grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. For example, instead of 'during they pursue their degree,' use 'while they pursue their degree.'

task achievement

Strengthen and expand on the examples provided to make them more relevant and specific.

coherence cohesion

Improve coherence by using more connectors and transitional phrases to make the essay flow smoother. Phrases like 'Firstly,' 'Moreover,' 'On the other hand,' and 'Furthermore' can help.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion can be more effective if it summarizes the key points discussed and reaffirms the stance more strongly.

coherence cohesion

Organize the paragraphs better by ensuring each paragraph discusses one main point to keep the essay coherent.

task achievement

The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages, which shows balanced analysis.

task achievement

The points regarding self-control and financial management are clearly explained.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

independence
self-reliance
finance management
exposure
broaden horizons
open-minded
adaptability
conducive environment
isolation
homesickness
financial burden
household duties
academic responsibilities
personal growth

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Your opinion

Schools concentrate for too much on traditional subjects which do not adequately prepare students for the realistic demands of the modern working world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?.

Some people say that tourism should be banned other think that tourism has many benefits discuss both ideas and give your opinion

Young drivers are careless & overconfident, and too many are killed in accidents. To eliminate this problem, we could teach children the skills of safe driving while they are at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The breakthroughs in medical science are by far the most significant advances in world scoeity over the the last two centuries. Dicuss this statement and give your opinion.

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.