Shopping is becoming more and more popular as a leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects. Why is shopping so popular? What effects does its increase in popularity have on individuals and on society?
Nowadays, shopping has been
in
Change preposition
apply
the
trend among individuals as Correct article usage
a
a
entertainment pastime. Change the article
an
While
, few people
categories
it as a positive trend, others believe purchasing Replace the word
categorise
things
have
associated downsides. Correct subject-verb agreement
has
This
essay will elucidate the reasons for ongoing
demand for shopping and its repercussions on the citizens.
Buying Correct article usage
the ongoing
things
have
drastically changed over Correct subject-verb agreement
has
the
time Correct article usage
apply
due to
improvement
in Fix the agreement mistake
improvements
the
technology. Correct article usage
apply
People
can purchase items through the websites,
Remove the comma
apply
while
staying in their homes. Moreover
, they have numerous options to compare products
online. These practice
have forced vendors to improve the quality and pricing Change the determiner
practices
for
their end Change preposition
of
products
. Thus
, people
are more satisfied in
shopping, than ever before.
Change preposition
with
Consequently
, this
surge in purchasing things
have
mostly positive effects on Correct subject-verb agreement
has
people
with minimal downsides. With
Change preposition
In
competitive
Correct article usage
a competitive
markeplace
, they purchase Correct your spelling
marketplace
things
based on their criteria. Additionally
, a lot of time is saved as they can order products
online through ecommerce
. Correct your spelling
e-commerce
For instance
, Flipkart and Instacart are among the top sites which delivers
Change the verb form
deliver
products
directly to the
homes. Correct article usage
apply
Also
, it widens the employement
sector as Correct your spelling
employment
organization
require ground staff, Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
hence
, it boost
the Change the verb form
boosts
overall
economy.
Shopping has been considered a leisure activity by a significant proportion of society. Undoubtedly, plethora
of paths are generated due Add an article
a plethora
the plethora
Change preposition
to it's
it's
acceptance around the globe. Replace the word
its
This
is good for both individuals and the society.Submitted by anmolkashyap68 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction and a conclusion, which is good. However, to improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea or set of closely related ideas. This will make the essay flow more logically.
task achievement
To better achieve the task requirements, ensure that each point you make directly answers the question. Your essay does touch on why shopping is popular and the effects on individuals and society, but these points could be more deeply explored and supported with specific examples and evidence.
task achievement
Include more specific examples and evidence to support your claims. For instance, when discussing the negative effects of increased shopping, you could mention specific studies or societal issues such as environmental impact.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your points well.
task achievement
You successfully identified some of the reasons why shopping is popular, such as technological improvements and the convenience of online shopping.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example