Shopping is becoming more and more popular as a leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects. Why is shopping so popular? What effects does its increase in popularity have on individuals and on society?

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Nowadays, shopping has been
in
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
a
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trend among individuals as
a
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an
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entertainment pastime.
While
, few
people
categories
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categorise
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it as a positive trend, others believe purchasing
things
have
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has
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associated downsides.
This
essay will elucidate the reasons for
ongoing
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the ongoing
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demand for shopping and its repercussions on the citizens. Buying
things
have
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has
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drastically changed over
the
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apply
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time
due to
improvement
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improvements
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in
the
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apply
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technology.
People
can purchase items through the websites
,
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apply
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while
staying in their homes.
Moreover
, they have numerous options to compare
products
online. These
practice
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practices
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have forced vendors to improve the quality and pricing
for
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of
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their end
products
.
Thus
,
people
are more satisfied
in
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with
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shopping, than ever before.
Consequently
,
this
surge in purchasing
things
have
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has
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mostly positive effects on
people
with minimal downsides.
With
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In
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competitive
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a competitive
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markeplace
Correct your spelling
marketplace
, they purchase
things
based on their criteria.
Additionally
, a lot of time is saved as they can order
products
online through
ecommerce
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e-commerce
.
For instance
, Flipkart and Instacart are among the top sites which
delivers
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deliver
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products
directly to
the
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apply
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homes.
Also
, it widens the
employement
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employment
sector as
organization
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organizations
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require ground staff,
hence
, it
boost
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boosts
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the
overall
economy. Shopping has been considered a leisure activity by a significant proportion of society. Undoubtedly,
plethora
Add an article
a plethora
the plethora
show examples
of paths are generated due
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to it's
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it's
Replace the word
its
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acceptance around the globe.
This
is good for both individuals and the society.
Submitted by anmolkashyap68 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction and a conclusion, which is good. However, to improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea or set of closely related ideas. This will make the essay flow more logically.
task achievement
To better achieve the task requirements, ensure that each point you make directly answers the question. Your essay does touch on why shopping is popular and the effects on individuals and society, but these points could be more deeply explored and supported with specific examples and evidence.
task achievement
Include more specific examples and evidence to support your claims. For instance, when discussing the negative effects of increased shopping, you could mention specific studies or societal issues such as environmental impact.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your points well.
task achievement
You successfully identified some of the reasons why shopping is popular, such as technological improvements and the convenience of online shopping.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • leisure activity
  • consumer culture
  • emotional satisfaction
  • consumerism
  • advertising influence
  • online shopping platforms
  • sense of pleasure
  • social interaction
  • boost the economy
  • compulsive shopping
  • materialism
  • environmental degradation
  • unsustainable demand
  • social inequalities
  • status through possessions
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