These days, in many countries, fewer and fewer people want to become teachers, particularly in secondary schools. What are the reasons for this? How could more people be encouraged to come into the teaching profession?

Nowadays,In different countries, there is a shortage of
teachers
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
in high schools ,
this
essay will discuss the reasons for
this
phenomenon and how to motivate more people to join
this
role . The main reason why more and more
teachers
refuse to work in secondary schools
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is because of the student behaviours that might affect the teacher's safety in the class, as they may encounter some challenging
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
during class time
that is
hard to deal with,
For example
, some learners would be
viloance
Correct your spelling
violence
inside the
calssroom
Correct your spelling
classroom
and may
harme
Correct your spelling
harm
the
teachers
if they
didnt
Correct your spelling
didn't
agree on something.
Furthermore
, They can assault the teacher outside of school hours.
However
, The education department can encourage more people to teenagers' teaching roles by providing more support for the
teachers
so they can feel more confident and in control when facing
this
situation.
For instance
, They can offer more supporting sessions helping the teacher to learn about what causes
this
negative attitude and how to deal with it. In conclusion, the reason why
teachers
are avoiding
Wrong verb form
avoid
show examples
teaching high school students is
because
Replace the word
that
show examples
some of them may have an aggressive attitude
that is
hard to come
along with
and in order to push more people toward teaching those students they should provide more forms of support for
teachers
around behiveure management and how to treat them.
Submitted by hebadyala on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure the introduction clearly outlines all parts of the prompt while avoiding minor grammatical errors, such as spaces after commas.
task achievement
Expand on examples to provide a better context; for instance, mention specific instances or studies that show a decline in teachers due to challenging student behavior.
coherence cohesion
Ensure transitions between paragraphs are smooth to enhance readability; consider using linking phrases such as 'Moreover,' and 'For example.'
coherence cohesion
Work on grammatical accuracy and consistency, particularly with subject-verb agreement and pluralization (e.g., 'students' behaviors' should be 'students' behavior').
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all argument points are sufficiently developed for the reader to understand the context and reasons behind claims.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task by identifying a clear problem and providing a potential solution.
task achievement
Good attempt to explain student behavior as a reason for fewer teachers in secondary schools.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: