IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some products can be made quickly by a machine. Other items take a long time to be made by hand. As a buyer, which do you prefer and why? Give specific details and examples in your answer.

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Undoubtedly, with the advent of technology, it become quite easy to manufacture things faster with the help of machines which was not possible a few years back when the furnished goods were produced manually consuming a lot of time.
This
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 essay will discuss the buyer's choice among the automatic and hand-created items.
To begin
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 with, it is true that machines are a blessing in disguise for every industry nowadays. We can now manufacture similar products in huge quantities with more precision and accuracy in no time.
This
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 results in providing cost-effective things to the purchaser and
also
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 boosts the nation's economy with more trade opportunities. To illustrate, clothing companies make similar kinds of clothes in huge quantities having exactly the same size and colour and because of
this
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 most of the native brands have a global presence.
In addition
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 to
this
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, the hand-furnished item production rate is low
however
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, it bolsters to provide more job options to the less educated but skilled local population.
Furthermore
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, it helps to save the skills that are now fading out from society.
Hence
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, it helps secure the nation's culture and motivates people to remain integrated with their traditional roots.
For example
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, the handmade woollen shawls of Kashmir are very expensive and popular only because of their handly knitted stuff and beautiful old-age prints.
This
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 in turn helped locals to save their extincting skills and transfer them to the coming generations. In conclusion, I assert that both physical and machine-made articles have their own pros and cons. I advocate that people should purchase blended produce to satisfy their growing needs and support communities to save their skills.
Thus
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,
this
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 way both the state and society will cultivate an avalanche of benefits.

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task achievement
Ensure all examples provided are directly relevant to the point being made. While your example about Kashmir shawls was good, ensure the connection to the argument about job options and tradition preservation is explicitly clear.
coherence cohesion
Try to maintain consistency in tense usage. For instance, 'it become quite easy' should be 'it has become quite easy.'
coherence cohesion
Further clarify how machine-made products benefit the economy and how handmade products contribute to preserving culture to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
You provided relevant points to support both sides of the argument, demonstrating a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your vocabulary and grammar are strong, making your points clear and easy to understand.
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