In some countries, students live at home with their family while they study at university, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do the advantages of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

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Students in different countries experience college life differently.
Whereas
some prefer to reside at
home
, others decide to reside at the university in boarding. In
this
essay, I will discuss the advantages of living away from
home
and discuss possible drawbacks Living away from
home
can have many benefits,
such
as learning to live independently from their parents.
This
fosters
indepence
Correct your spelling
independence
because people learn essential life skills
such
as cooking, budgeting and time management.
Similarly
, being away from
home
gives students the opportunity to build a broader social network as they interact with a diverse group of people, potentially from various different backgrounds.
Submitted by laurens.belgium on

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introduction conclusion present
Your essay would benefit from a more explicit conclusion summarizing your points and providing a clear answer to the question of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific examples to better illustrate your points; this will make your arguments more compelling and relatable.
complete response
Expand on the drawbacks of living away from home. Currently, the essay focuses mainly on the advantages. A balanced discussion that addresses both sides of the issue is essential for a higher score in task achievement.
logical structure
The essay is well-structured with a clear division of ideas.
supported main points
Your points about independence and building a social network are well-articulated and relevant to the topic.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas are presented clearly, and the language used is appropriate for an academic essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fosters independence
  • self-reliance
  • essential life skills
  • cultural backgrounds
  • academic performance
  • resilience
  • adaptability
  • financially burdensome
  • homesickness
  • emotional stress
  • mental health
  • familial support
  • isolation and loneliness
  • stable and supportive environment
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