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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some are of the opinion that people are naturally born as good leaders while others feel that leadership skills can be learned. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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The argument about whether a leader is born or made has raised a lot of concerns , especially in the corporate world with some believing that they are hereditary traits that
one
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 is born with, and some being of the opinion that they are acquired skills.
This
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 essay will provide a detailed breakdown of both views and why l stand with the latter's viewpoint. On
one
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 hand, it is somehow argumentative to say individuals are inborn with these leadership personas.
This
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 is evidenced by cooperations where leadership has revolved around the family business from
one
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 bloodline to another,
for example
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, Walmart has been a family-run business for decades and all who have led in the past did not have to go to school to be taught how to take over the company when their turn came, as
such
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 it proves that point that being the head is an innate ability.
Moreover
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, there are
also
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 people who are naturally eloquent and sound which is
one
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 of the most prominent skill sets that a forerunner needs, as
such
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, these beings need no lessons to attain
such
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 expertise, to illustrate, Martin Luther King Jr was
one
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 the most proficient speakers in the history and as
such
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 led many campaigns back in the day.
On the other hand
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, with respect to changing times and patterns, l believe that for
one
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 to be an effective manager they have to learn certain ingenuities, which is more than just being eloquent and sound commander should be a person who can think strategically, achieve a certain level of experience or education depending on the role that they are to manage.
For instance
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, being a manager of a bank requires
one
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 to have knowledge of how banks work, accounting systems, and financial literacy, which can only be gained by attending university or diploma institutions.
Furthermore
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, world leaders have never been chosen on innate abilities but on experience in certain offices held in the past and their number of achievements, which
further
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 points out that sitting at the table of authority or power is not something
that is
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 a birthright but an art that needs to be attained and experienced. In conclusion,
while
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 it can be argued that people are naturally born leaders with examples of personal like Martin Luther King Jr who was an eloquent speaker, l am of the opinion that it is a technique that needs to be learned as evidenced by the selection of Presidents worldwide and managerial positions in sectors like banks.

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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task prompt, detailing both views on the topic and offering your own opinion effectively. However, strive to provide a slightly stronger introduction and conclusion by clearly outlining your main points and summarizing succinctly.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized and the paragraphs flow reasonably well, ensure each point logically follows the previous one. This will enhance the overall structure and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Although there are supporting examples, be careful with the accuracy and relevance of these examples. Ensure they directly support your arguments and are clearly linked to your points.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining your transition sentences to ensure smoother progression between points and paragraphs. This will help in creating a more logically structured essay and improve the overall cohesion.
task achievement
You successfully discussed both views on the topic, offering a balanced view and providing your own opinion clearly.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion of your essay are both present and contribute to the overall clarity of your argument.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples which help in illustrating your points effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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