In recent years many local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers to do their shopping. Is it a positive or negative development?

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There is no denying that the number of
customers
who are going to go to large shopping
centres
for their shopping has been increasing over and over these days.
Due to
the development of customer benefits in large shopping
centres
, many people would prefer to shop in big shopping
centres
.
However
, some people say
this
issue has negative effects on our association. Visiting large
centres
for shopping seems positive for people because of the convenience.
For example
, it is possible to buy anything you planned at once in large shopping
centres
. They provide plenty of options to
customers
such
as fashion clothes, shoes, accessories sections and even food courts which is called ‘All in One under one roof’.
Whereas
, the issue has negative effects on our society as well. There are problems with the trend.
Firstly
, the closed local stores have been increasing gradually because of reduced visitors.
According to
eminent economists, the more
customers
feel attracted to shopping under one roof the less
customers
visit local stores unless they do provide special experiences to
customers
.
Secondly
, the financial penalty for local store owners. In a way, the financial penalty is a natural consequence of a decrease in visiting local stores.
Therefore
, the local economic power and local interactions are getting weaker.
According to
some statistics, there is a correlation between population congestion in a specific place and economic unbalance. In conclusion, for the reasons mentioned above, I personally believe that large shopping
centres
have positive effects
although
there are negative things. Because any change has costs and the created market might be producing new jobs.
Submitted by ryujaekwang0928 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but could be more impactful. Try to make them more compelling to effectively frame your argument.
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Some ideas could be more clearly expressed. Aim to refine and articulate your viewpoints more precisely.
task response
The essay provides a balanced look at the positive and negative aspects of large shopping centers, highlighting both viewpoints effectively.
coherence cohesion
Main points are presented with adequate support, demonstrating an understanding of the issue.

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic decline
  • job losses
  • stimulate the economy
  • consumer convenience
  • under one roof
  • lower prices
  • erode local culture
  • unique character
  • carbon emissions
  • sustainable lifestyle
  • community hubs
  • social interactions
  • community spirit
  • local engagement
  • food courts
  • entertainment areas
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