children are now less active in their free time than in the past therefore sports lessons must be compulsory in schools To what extent Do you agree or decide we give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
These days ,
young
generation Correct article usage
the young
tend
to spend most of their leisure time doing no physical activity, but making sports mandatory in Correct subject-verb agreement
tends
schools
is not a great decision. So, I generally disagree with the statement and in this
essay, I will consider both views and give my opinion.
I believe one
of the main reasons that exercise should not be obligatory in places like schools
is because it may have negative
impact on youths. Some young people are not really into sports , so forcing them to do that will make them hate that subject more. Add an article
a negative
Therefore
, they refuse to do sports correctly and may injure themselves just to run from it or make excuses to not go to school on sport
days. Change the noun form
sports
One
of my causins
is a teacher and she narrated the story of some of her Correct your spelling
cousins
students
who did not come to school in
days that they had to do exercise and missed other lessons Change preposition
on
such
as math and physics. Moreover
, students
may fall
to pass their exams as they were absent in most of them.
There are three better ways that Correct your spelling
fail
schools
can represent in order to increase their students
physical activity without forcing them. Change to a genitive case
student's
students'
First
Change the article
The first
one
is Fix the infinitive
to envourage
envourage
them to participate in those classes.Correct your spelling
encourage
encouraged
For instance
, they can allocate extra points for their tests to those who attend in
Change preposition
apply
sport
sections. Change the noun form
sports
Second
Change the article
The second
one
is give
Fix the infinitive
to give
students
some gifts and prises
like stationary stuff and money so they will be more enthusiastic to do their Correct your spelling
prizes
homeworks
alongside taking care of their Correct your spelling
homework
body
.And the third Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
one
is , teach
pupils about the benefits of exercising and its effects on their health situation and their body. So, Fix the infinitive
to teach
students
will be aware and will choose wisely.
To sum up
, in order to make younger
generation Correct article usage
the younger
to
participate in Fix the infinitive
apply
sport
classes, Fix the agreement mistake
sports
schools
can encourage them instead
of forcing them , which can have more positive impacts on their lives.Submitted by TUTOO on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
grammar
Be mindful of grammatical errors and try to ensure verb-subject agreement and correct usage of tenses. For example, 'One of my cousins is a teacher' should be 'One of my cousins is a teacher'.
sentence structure
Try to improve the variety and complexity of your sentence structures. Using different types of sentences can make your argument more compelling.
examples
Including more specific and relevant examples can further substantiate your points. Real-world examples or statistical data could add more weight to your arguments.
introduction
Your introduction clearly states your position and what you will discuss in the essay. This sets a good tone for your readers.
arguments
You provided some practical alternatives to compulsory sports lessons, which enriched your argument.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical and your main points are well-supported. This contributes to a higher score in coherence and cohesion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.