Some people think the police should carry guns because this can make people protected, while others think the police should not carry guns because the police with guns will lead to more violent crimes. Discuss both views and give your opinion
As
Correct word choice
apply
People
pay more attention to the relationship between the police
and citizens. There comes up with two opinions. One of them considers that people
’s safety is guaranteed by the police
who are carrying guns
. However
, others think that it may lead to more violent crimes
. In my perspective, Police
who carry guns
can protect people
.
Firstly
, guns
can protect people
from crimes
. Different from other weapons. Guns
are more powerful; they can immediately kill criminals from far away and it is super useful when people
’s life is threatened. Also
, when police
are carrying guns
, they tend to be braver when they are facing criminals which to some extent increases the efficiency and possibility of saving one’s life. For instance
, criminals may get a gun
through various sources. When one’s life is in danger, a police
that carrying spontoons is at a disadvantage when they are facing the criminal who owns a gun
. Therefore
, it is necessary for police
to own a gun
to protect themselves and the people
.
Nonetheless
, police
with guns
may lead to more violent crimes
. Police
who are lack training and more emotional may cause worse consequences. They are confused about when and why they use a gun
in some tough situations which may lead to accidental shooting. Therefore
, it is necessary to do more strict pre-selecting and all kinds of tests to judge whether a person can be a
professional Remove the article
apply
police
and all of them need to be trained hard to avoid the occurrence of violent crimes
.
To conclude
, police
do need guns
to protect their people
, but strict consultation and selection are needed as well.Submitted by 572184932 on
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content
Your essay thoroughly presents both sides of the argument, but it could benefit from deeper analysis and more specific examples to make your points stronger. For instance, you might provide a real-life example where armed police successfully deescalated a dangerous situation.
content
Ensure your introduction explicitly outlines what you will discuss and clearly states your opinion. While you do provide an opinion, it can be articulated more clearly at the end of the introduction rather than at the beginning of the body paragraph.
language
It is important to address minor grammatical errors (e.g., 'different from other weapons' should be ‘unlike other weapons’). Additionally, be consistent with singular and plural forms and proper use of articles ('a police' should be 'a police officer' and 'the police' in general contexts).
structure
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion, which enhances readability and demonstrates logical coherence.
content
Your essay successfully covers both aspects of the debate and reflects a balanced viewpoint, which is a crucial element of Task Achievement in IELTS Writing Task 2.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.